One more day....

Growing up...












Funny shot of him @ a mini piano at ELC United Square. To watch the cheesy video of the lil maestro in action: click here.

He's going to be ONE tomorrow! Once again, i am amazed by the speed with which time has slipped by. To be honest, the first few weeks did seem loooong especially since Val was a typical Dr Sears "high-need" baby who needed a lot of carrying, cuddling, nursing and gentle handling. I really despaired thinking, Oh no, this is the most challenging task i've ever experienced. Give me a mountain to climb any day! But once he learnt to smile at around that magical 6-week mark, things really became a lot rosier. I hope that this weekend, i will have time to write a better, and more thought out The Year in Review on that boy named Val. Oh, and Val's managing to walk up to six steps now (click here to see video) before collapsing into a sack of giggles. He's also crawling strangely - - like doing a wheelbarrow push - lifting his kneecaps away from the ground so instead of looking up, he stares a lot at the ground and of course, ends up crawling smack into walls, doors, you name it. Sigh.

Ball

Tell me if Val is obsessed with balls or not. He mumbles 'Ball' sometimes in his sleep, and when he's awake, 80% of his time is spent chasing after the rounded objects, pushing the huge pink gym ball, throwing them helter skelter around the house, learning from granma how to bounce them off walls, and hurtling them into deep corners of the playroom. Needless to say, the first word (besides the mama, dada he used to mutter) that we can confidently say he understands is 'Ball'. Often the first thing he says when he wakes up is 'Ball?' with his tiny hands in a 'where' position. If I sign to him the Ball sign, he also knows immediately what i'm asking for. I dunno if this is a matter of nature's programming where being a boy makes him naturally keen on these things. But then again, his mama has great ball sense and can pick up most ball games easily, while daddy used to be an intrepid footballer in his youth. For now, it's amusing how everything is a 'ball' to him - the real ones, as well as everything else that can be tossed including balloons and blocks.

Warning: This is a SHAMELESSLY thick-skinned, feel good post.

So, today i wish to give myself many pats on my *now-healed back. *pat *pat *pat. First, i got back my second assignment from last semester - and it was a ..... drummmmrooolllll..... High Distinction!!! Whoot Whooot Whooot.... Combined with my first assignment, it should still give me an overall HD for that unit. ..... *clap Clap Clap* now, those who know me know that i don't boast very often or blow my own trumpet (really) So why am i so shamelessly applauding myself? Cos i just needed to feel good about myself , OKAY? This is one of those "look at yourself in the mirror, and say you're beautiful" moments. Life's dealt me very many curveballs in the last year so i think i deserve to bask in a bit of glory, albeit in my little virtual space here. Second, i was told recently that the only reason i was paid 50 cents a word (for a certain magazine) was because they know I write well enough they don't need to spend lots of time editing my pieces and so they think i deserve that amount. wooo... i tell ya, it was a simple remark, but it gave me a real thrill. truly. for a broadcast journalist turned magazine writer. i do think it's high praise. And so, in my shameless bid to make myself happy, i am broadcasting my achievements just this once on my space. So if you think it was irksome, just surf elsewhere.

Broke back

I'm not gay (in all sense of the word) but i sure feel like i've got a broken back. Thank God for acupuncture and "ba guan" cos that seemed to have eased the sprain A LOT. The Chinese physician says i've got wind circulating in my back which explains the lack of recovery from a cold. So now i have to plaster my back like an old woman, drink bowls of black, horrid, bitter medicine, and try to keep a zen state of mind for a fast recover. Arggh.. I hate to be ill.

Bear-napped!

The bear was a gift from Washington for Val's granmama but instead the lil 'un has literally bear-napped it as his own. Toys are great when they teach babies the right values. We ask him to 'sayang' and to hug the bear which he does now with great aplomb, and then when you goo-gaa over his apparent show of affection, he would - with all the might he could muster - fling the stuffed animal as far as it would sail across the room. He is tickled by our dismay. I do hope that he weans off that throwing habit which he's acquired with affection. Mr Smelly BottomLay now tosses anything in his sight - books, balls, toys, whatever. He will play with the object, study it, thumb through it, for about five minutes and once its novelty expires, --- wheeeeze ---- the said object goes crashing metres away. His little arms are rather strong i must say. So now, we are very careful not to let the throwing monster near remote controls, the telephone, or any of our cellphones which he has a penchant for. Cos, oouch... too many times already, the boy has set sail those gadgets with a sudden, wicked swing of the arm. Looks like he's taken after mama in the frisbee throwing category.

Family

Val has a pair of the most wonderful grandparents.... Then again, i think i've been blessed with a pair of the most wonderful parents... Their love is so unconditional it's touching. Much as he brings joy to them, the pair of grams certainly bring lots of joy to him too. Thanks Mom & Dad.

Table Manners

Val's taught us table manners. Truly. You see, our family's been the type that have had TV dinners since the time i had memories. But no, no, not the dysfunctional type of family that each have their own TVs, and gobble down their food unsocially. We ALL sat together in front of the TV, eating our meal and discussing the Ch8 drama serials or the evening news together. So despite all the bad stuff that's been said about eating in front of the TV, none of us are obese and anti-social. But i digress. What i meant to say was that, for a while, Val began resisting to sit in the high chair, and my Ma who usually feeds him had to resort to carrying him at the gate, distracting him enough to open up his mouth - this even if the munchkin IS hungry. one day, i just had a brainwave - duh- i realised that whenever i was outside with friends and having a meal, Val would quietly sit in the high chair, exhibiting none of those bad manners he displayed at home. So i just decided to try it out -- i asked my folks to have dinner ALL together at the proper dining table one night and plonked Val in his high chair. LO and BEHOLD! He sat there for almost 45minutes, finishing up a hearty bowl of porridge, and staying put there till everyone had finished. I only had to shove the occasional book to him to keep him occupied. Since then, the family's eating habits have changed thanks to the little man. We are now finally, after decades, using the dining table for its said purpose. Previously, it was - homework table, calligraphy table, junk table, - now, it is proudly restored to its original mission - to hold our meals. So thanks mate, for bringing table manners home. Kisses, Mummy.

Mrs Incredible

I now know why the animators chose to give Mrs Incredible the power to stretch infinitely like a rubber band. She can be pulled, contorted, and manipulated into all kinds of objects, and still look pretty good. Sounds familiar? Many days i feel like a Mrs Incredible except that i don't end up looking as good as she does. Today, ah today. It is barely past 10, and already i feel reaaalllly stretched. Really wondering when the stretch would reach that limit - what do they call it? The elastic limit. Arggh....

Learning the ropes early....

The boy's been down with viral fever this past week. We had no clue where he got it from, except that the most likely culprit could have been a fellow tot at a Gymbabes try-out session last Saturday. So, all my plans for this week (it was my 'break' week between studies and work) flew outta the window to care for the poor boy who was really miserable especially on the first day of having high fever. Today, his fever was completely gone so i brought him to a playground for a lil time out of the house. He's still too young to enjoy the ropes but his toes (ahh! those toes!) they still show so much potential to be a rock climber. I think he has griper glue on them.....





Seeking out new playthings...


Poking his curious fingers into everything, everywhere


"hmm... how do i get onto this?"

Nuts- 2

So the Nuts have arrived...........they look and feel sticky and i can't wait to get them in the washing machine. But we didn't wash anything today.... tomorrow it shall be. To the test, soap nuts... and when i have MORE TIME....... (ah... that is a luxury) i shall start making my soap nut concoctions.

idle mind

ONE day... that's all it took for me to be glad that i am studying and working and being stressed out by it. Early this morning at 0034hrs, i submitted my second essay of the semester and went to bed. I woke up, a few hours later, wondering 'Hmm... what shall i do today?' In the end, the day melted away like butter on hot corn. It was fun, yes it was, playing ball with Val but after a while i really got restless and itched to get back to my studies. How SICK is that? LOL. really. and so, although i had declared a week of rest before the summer semester starts on 9 Nov, i actually went to the uni's distant learning website and began downloading study notes and readings! That experience brought a pleasurable tingle down my back.. Oooo i am turning into geeky mom. But truly, i really expected myself to veg out, relieved that the final essay was done but i didn't. So perhaps i was born to have a hard life - you know, the sorta life where one never really gets to rest, prefering to be occupied constantly. I need to be able to just chill and idle. That - i would say - is an art.

Baby on the loose...

Val's third trip to the library where he's let loose and takes off like a canon. He scurries away without a care after a feed, and heads straight for the section that's obviously not for him. Hey val, you're not 8 years old yet! Come back...



He decides to choose his own book. Picking them out with his fingers, and making a mess basically. He discovers the book ends and starts sliding the metal out of the nook, collapsing books. All the while as he leisurely 'picks' through the books, his frantic mama is busy putting the books back before the library 'auntie' spots the vandal in action.



The kind gentleman pauses long enough from his furtive search for a good book in order to let mama capture one steady shot with her mobile phone camera. Thank you.



He even goes over to the Parenting section and proceeds to pull out more books. Perhaps he is trying to drop me some hints????



This was the book he pulled out....



GULP...

from babe to boy...

it seems like Val became a boy overnight. where did his baby days go? they're lost in a wild mess of crazy moments and now i can't find them anymore! thank goodness for the copious amount of photos i took in the first six months...
Suddenly, he understands us so much more. He points to the door to demand to go out. He protests if i throw a ball at his favourite fish wind chime and YES! he can PLAY BALL now which makes playing a lot more fun than before. He hurls his 8 little balls around the house, scoots around hunting for them, and then throws them whoever asks for them. It's funny when he flings them behind him instead.


Much as i hope he becomes a lil bookworm, i haven't been quite 'regimental' with the book reading. He doesn't pay attention to my bedtime stories anymore preferring to turn the pages faster than my reading so these days, i just scatter a few books on the bed and he'll browse through them, flipping the pages whilst muttering to himself. And of course, sometimes he's more absorbed by the box more than the books. Oh well... at least his mind is engaged.

Ah... time does fly! I am reminding myself to treasure each and every day before boy turns teen!

Confessions of a Coupon/Voucher mom

Okay I confess. i've become one of THOSE coupon/voucher moms. It's a nightmare but true.

I was no spendthrift before i became a mommy, in fact i saved quite a fair bit of my income but being single and having a reasonably good income, i never really kept a calculative tab on my spendings or looked for ways and means to reduce my savings.

These days? I've morphed into a coupon/voucher mom - ever on the lookout for useful discount coupons (Save $3 when you buy a pack of diapers! Save $5 when you buy a tin of mom's milk!) because they DO reduce costs despite how AUNTY they are. Really. I used to scoff at people who scan the papers for good discounts and turned up my nose at sales but now, er-hum, i DO take a second look and try to plan my shopping more strategically. Hey, having a baby can be EXPENSIVE business!

Besides hoarding coupons (I really don't have THAT many of them...), i've also observed that my stash of vouchers have grown. Vouchers from credit card spendings (my trusty Robinsons card gives $30 for every $4800 spent), vouchers from credit card referrals (I only have ONE referral and that was my sis but that got me $30 Tangs vouchers), and vouchers for my birthday ($100 for ZARA from my dearest sista who read my blog about me becoming a househag - thank you!). In my single days, those vouchers would have had NO chance of lingering in my wallet for sooo long. Before you can say 'shopping', they would have gone poof into thin air as i take to the malls to spend them. But now, sadly, even as the stash grows, i find that i have hardly any time to spare for shopping. No, the sport has become quite utilitarian - plan, go, grab, leave. This instrumental approach is either because i've got Val in my ergo and hence unable to try any clothes on, or he's in a stroller threatening a meltdown anytime, or my mom's taking care of him at home and that immeasurable guilt descends on me whenever i go out for meetings and feel tempted to swing by a mall for some mindless distraction.

I never was quite the shopper and so i am amazed how much i actually miss those idllyic days of going about malls on weekdays (! yes, i used to love my off days which always fell on weekdays and could beat the crowds), or those long afternoons at the bookstores, browsing books and savouring a cuppa coffee. My last trip at Borders was on Saturday when i sneakily went by after my (once a week) yoga session and had to give myself a time limit to grab 5 books before heading home. I was wracked by guilt for that extra time (which went from half an hour to an hour), apologising profusely by the time i got home. Oo and guess what, in my i bought a motherhood magazine because it gave away a cute baby hat. Arggh....

Luckily, all's not lost. Thanks to the internet, i've found a new realm of shopping experience via the 01101010101 codes. I've gone international and have not regretted. They are really some great finds online and international shipping rates have dropped a fair bit. And hey, in that virtual world, there're also ways to reduce costs! Consummate internet shoppers have taught me to 'google' for discount codes before making a purchase, which can sometimes shave off as much as 20% from your total bill. And of course, keeping in mind that one of my credit cards gives DOUBLE points at certain times of the month or year means i now plan when to shop and also to pay for my bill from the university. Truly, i think i now qualify for the AUNTY Hall of Fame.

The only thing now for me to do is to make sure i don't become a virtual shopaholic because those credit card bills - ooo they can give you a big bite in your tush to remind you they're very real....

Exploited WAHMS - stand up and be united!

Ok so Sher and I ranted on the phone this afternoon when we started on the topic of how much we were being paid for our freelance writing. PEANUTS.... really. We totally agree that those blasted magazines run by the two big media companies in Singapore are so absolutely exploiting us - WAHMS - work at home mums. Recently i was offered $300 for a 1200 word article - that's 25 cents per word. Very sad to think that this is how much they value our writing. So did i take up the job? YESSSS.... wait wait, it's not like i'm desperate for that moolah (note: they can take up mooonths to pay us); no, it's not that i don't have other writing assignments (note: i have a full time job AND studies); and NO... i am not stoopid, crazy or simply masochistic. The only reason i agreed was because the article is going to be about ALTERNATIVE birthing options - hey, that's my kind of thing and hey, this is a mainstream magazine and a great opportunity for me to brainwash some moms to be open minded and to try in my little way to let other moms know that birthing is not just about screaming your way to delivery. And so, i said yes.... and then no to two other assignments that were just simply too impossible for me to complete.

But that's the story of our lives. At least for some of us, cos i can't presume to speak on everyone's behalf. We write because we do enjoy learning new things, and because we're interested. But i think the mags believe that we're just desperate SAHMs (stay home moms) who have nothing else to do and so won't mind a LITTLE income on the side. Sher and I both agree that hey, that's not US. We were professionally trained in school, plus we are writing from actual experiences and we do pretty good research, AND we do write well (ya la.... this is trumpeting ourselves but hey, we need to stand up and be counted sometimes!). So we do deserve more respect.

And so why are we subjecting ourselves to such exploitation? WHY? Would things help if we unionise WAHMS who write? That's be a first in Singapore! But hey, at least set up a network and perhaps lobby for better rates? Would Singaporean WAHMs take up a stand? Or will they simply say "never mind, lah" and allow the mags to continue dumbing down our rates? Do our words really mean so little?

Do you know other WAHMS who write? Give a shout out! We could arrange a lunch out for WAHMS-WW (work@home moms who write) and see what brews...

KO: Val 0, Swim 1

I wish we could go swimming every time Val needs a nap because those kicks in the water, and the splash splash splash definitely takes a lot out of him - so much so that he quietly succumbed to being in the old/new stroller, and then nodded off on our walk back. Ahh.... it was a nice surprise to see him fast asleep and even funnier with his 'sam seng' style of throwing one leg over the side. Seems like many babies have such habits. He was so KOed by the swim that when we reached home, i just left him in the stroller, switched on the fan, and went for a shower. When i came back he was still fast asleep. Aw... such a cute sight. But it was 6PM so i had no choice but to rouse him gently out of dreamland, and still he tried to nod back to sleep. In the end, that half hour shut eye gave him extra battery to stay up till 9pm.....Argg, swimming can be double-edged fun!

Ad nauseam

Can one get totally sick of doing something? I sure am feeling that way.......... i feel like my fingers are glued to the keyboard, my eyes oh they are sore, and my brains, my brains, my poor frazzled grey matter they are turning into mush..... I should be thankful really that words, they run quite freely from my fingers onto the typepad so when it comes to writing 3000 words essays for school, it's not that daunting a task as compared to someone else who might struggle even to fill 2 pages with text. Yet, it is the seeming ease that sets one up for the fall. You see, now my full time job is also all about words, AND that upcoming internship that i am negotiating with a women's organisation (this is to fulfill my masters requirements) will ALSO be about writing. Why? because every organisation needs a writer, they need stories about their work, and since it's something i do for a living, it's also the easy way out for me. i.e. it means i could possibly complete my 300 hours much more easily by doing something i am familiar with. BUT it also means i pigeon hole myself into a writer's square. It means i don't give myself the opportunity to learn another skill - i had wanted to intern at a women's organisation BECAUSE i want to learn more about advocacy, activism, and management of NGOs. But when you only have 24 hours a day, an energetic child who demands lots of your attention (which i willing give!), it means that a lot of the work is done after dark when the boy is finally asleep. and this means, i have to find the EASIEST way out of everything. and so....i fall back to relying on writing. i do hope the nausea never get so bad, it induces me to hurl

NUTS!

i'm NUTs about soapnuts! haven't even bought them but getting SOOOO excited just reading about them. I got to know about them a while ago but of course, tonight, being the night i'm supposed to study and get onto my second essay of the semester, i chose...er-hum... to procrastinate and went 'daydreaming' on internet (the connection is usually lousy at night, man... tonight, everything i clicked came on straight away! it's fate i reckon).

Anyways, if you haven't heard about soapnuts, go to this, and this websites amongst many others to read cos this is really supposed to be a SHORT blog and not wikipedia :-) Okay, so i'm about to buy my first bag of Soapnuts and then try to make soapnut liquid cleaners out of them (here's a recipe) - they can be used as shampoo, handwash, dishwashing cleaners, car wash, floor cleaners, pet shampoo, etc etc etc..... ANYTHING that needs cleansing really.......I promise that if my experiment works, i shall get more, and give out bottles of this all-natural cleaner to friends keen to have a greener option in their household.

I'm also suggesting that my sis, who has tasked me to find 'green' wedding favours for her big do, to buy the soap nuts and i'll round up a few friends to package them into soap nut bags. Of course, the words on the card would be "WE'RE NUTS ABOUT EACH OTHER!" cheesy right? but soooooo cool too... Soap Nuts Soap nuts.. Soap Nuts... i'm gonna dream about them tonight...(p/s: there's even a soapnut library online!)

I hope the bag i buy will have a few seeds too.... then maybe i can plant my own soap nut bush...

tree tree

and so i turned 33 today....
i had a hair cut in order to snip away all those feelings of haggardness... i know it'll take more than that - a visit to the dentist is still pending, and of course, a relook at my terribly outdated wardrobe. you see, when you have lived in a dusty little citadel tucked away in Asia's corner where everyone else you are close to live out of a suitcase, you start to forget a lil about fashion trends and are content to just rotate your clothes according to which are washed and which are not ironed. Now that i am back in THE CITY, i sometimes feel a bit like my friends' domestic helper when i go out with them, with Val in tow.... Yikes. Anyways, that project - of updating wardrobe- remains a thought until i have a spare moment and LOTS more moolah which i do not possess at this time. Treated my folks - who are THE WORLD'S BEST PARENTS - to japanese buffet to thank them for all the happiness they have given me and for standing by me unfailingly in every instance of my short little life. Being a parent now, i guess i can finally begin to appreciate all the concern they had for me, which were always disguised with lots of nagging. Man... it's tough being a parent - you never know how your kid will turn out even if you try your darnest. And so.... what have i achieved in the past year? I created a life - which i must say, is QUITE an achievement don't ya think? ;-O

my new old stroller

so this is one photo that deserves a special mention because it captures a historic moment. It's the first, uno, primeiro, time that Mr "I hate my stroller" Lay slept in his "new secondhand/old stroller" that I got off a motherhood forum for $55. I had put him in after he fell asleep from nursing. (yeah, yeah i can hear all you Tracy Hogg fans out there "tsk tsk-ing" away for letting him fall asleep at the breast...)

Val has NEVER fallen asleep in a stroller, rather he views them with a strong suspicion so he is never relaxed in one, but super alert, and always checking and making sure mommy's not going to run away and thus strives to stay awake no matter how tired he is. The previous stroller which was a hand-me-down from a cousin had only a three point harness which val learnt how to get out of and would stand precariously on it. A few times, when i looked away, he was already up and hanging onto the handle bars threatening to topple it. So i had no choice but to go online looking for a cheap stroller with 5-point harness. He's smart. Once he acquainted himself with this one, he realised that there's simply no escape for Baby Houdini and thus he has actually learnt to deal with it. Of course i need to ply him with a range of different distractions, and once in a while take him out of it for a cuddle.

Yesterday i took him for a 45 min walk in the stroller, i was definitely ready for a nap after but my lil man, who was yawning non-stop, still fought off the ZZZ monster while in the machine. Although he did sleep for an hour on the bed right after......