Monday, December 01, 2008
Ball
Tell me if Val is obsessed with balls or not. He mumbles 'Ball' sometimes in his sleep, and when he's awake, 80% of his time is spent chasing after the rounded objects, pushing the huge pink gym ball, throwing them helter skelter around the house, learning from granma how to bounce them off walls, and hurtling them into deep corners of the playroom. Needless to say, the first word (besides the mama, dada he used to mutter) that we can confidently say he understands is 'Ball'. Often the first thing he says when he wakes up is 'Ball?' with his tiny hands in a 'where' position. If I sign to him the Ball sign, he also knows immediately what i'm asking for. I dunno if this is a matter of nature's programming where being a boy makes him naturally keen on these things. But then again, his mama has great ball sense and can pick up most ball games easily, while daddy used to be an intrepid footballer in his youth. For now, it's amusing how everything is a 'ball' to him - the real ones, as well as everything else that can be tossed including balloons and blocks.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Warning: This is a SHAMELESSLY thick-skinned, feel good post.
So, today i wish to give myself many pats on my *now-healed back. *pat *pat *pat. First, i got back my second assignment from last semester - and it was a ..... drummmmrooolllll..... High Distinction!!! Whoot Whooot Whooot.... Combined with my first assignment, it should still give me an overall HD for that unit. ..... *clap Clap Clap* now, those who know me know that i don't boast very often or blow my own trumpet (really) So why am i so shamelessly applauding myself? Cos i just needed to feel good about myself , OKAY? This is one of those "look at yourself in the mirror, and say you're beautiful" moments. Life's dealt me very many curveballs in the last year so i think i deserve to bask in a bit of glory, albeit in my little virtual space here. Second, i was told recently that the only reason i was paid 50 cents a word (for a certain magazine) was because they know I write well enough they don't need to spend lots of time editing my pieces and so they think i deserve that amount. wooo... i tell ya, it was a simple remark, but it gave me a real thrill. truly. for a broadcast journalist turned magazine writer. i do think it's high praise. And so, in my shameless bid to make myself happy, i am broadcasting my achievements just this once on my space. So if you think it was irksome, just surf elsewhere.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Broke back
I'm not gay (in all sense of the word) but i sure feel like i've got a broken back. Thank God for acupuncture and "ba guan" cos that seemed to have eased the sprain A LOT. The Chinese physician says i've got wind circulating in my back which explains the lack of recovery from a cold. So now i have to plaster my back like an old woman, drink bowls of black, horrid, bitter medicine, and try to keep a zen state of mind for a fast recover. Arggh.. I hate to be ill.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Bear-napped!
The bear was a gift from Washington for Val's granmama but instead the lil 'un has literally bear-napped it as his own. Toys are great when they teach babies the right values. We ask him to 'sayang' and to hug the bear which he does now with great aplomb, and then when you goo-gaa over his apparent show of affection, he would - with all the might he could muster - fling the stuffed animal as far as it would sail across the room. He is tickled by our dismay. I do hope that he weans off that throwing habit which he's acquired with affection. Mr Smelly BottomLay now tosses anything in his sight - books, balls, toys, whatever. He will play with the object, study it, thumb through it, for about five minutes and once its novelty expires, --- wheeeeze ---- the said object goes crashing metres away. His little arms are rather strong i must say. So now, we are very careful not to let the throwing monster near remote controls, the telephone, or any of our cellphones which he has a penchant for. Cos, oouch... too many times already, the boy has set sail those gadgets with a sudden, wicked swing of the arm. Looks like he's taken after mama in the frisbee throwing category.
Family
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Table Manners

Val's taught us table manners. Truly. You see, our family's been the type that have had TV dinners since the time i had memories. But no, no, not the dysfunctional type of family that each have their own TVs, and gobble down their food unsocially. We ALL sat together in front of the TV, eating our meal and discussing the Ch8 drama serials or the evening news together. So despite all the bad stuff that's been said about eating in front of the TV, none of us are obese and anti-social. But i digress. What i meant to say was that, for a while, Val began resisting to sit in the high chair, and my Ma who usually feeds him had to resort to carrying him at the gate, distracting him enough to open up his mouth - this even if the munchkin IS hungry. one day, i just had a brainwave - duh- i realised that whenever i was outside with friends and having a meal, Val would quietly sit in the high chair, exhibiting none of those bad manners he displayed at home. So i just decided to try it out -- i asked my folks to have dinner ALL together at the proper dining table one night and plonked Val in his high chair. LO and BEHOLD! He sat there for almost 45minutes, finishing up a hearty bowl of porridge, and staying put there till everyone had finished. I only had to shove the occasional book to him to keep him occupied. Since then, the family's eating habits have changed thanks to the little man. We are now finally, after decades, using the dining table for its said purpose. Previously, it was - homework table, calligraphy table, junk table, - now, it is proudly restored to its original mission - to hold our meals. So thanks mate, for bringing table manners home. Kisses, Mummy.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Mrs Incredible
I now know why the animators chose to give Mrs Incredible the power to stretch infinitely like a rubber band. She can be pulled, contorted, and manipulated into all kinds of objects, and still look pretty good. Sounds familiar? Many days i feel like a Mrs Incredible except that i don't end up looking as good as she does. Today, ah today. It is barely past 10, and already i feel reaaalllly stretched. Really wondering when the stretch would reach that limit - what do they call it? The elastic limit. Arggh....
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Learning the ropes early....
The boy's been down with viral fever this past week. We had no clue where he got it from, except that the most likely culprit could have been a fellow tot at a Gymbabes try-out session last Saturday. So, all my plans for this week (it was my 'break' week between studies and work) flew outta the window to care for the poor boy who was really miserable especially on the first day of having high fever. Today, his fever was completely gone so i brought him to a playground for a lil time out of the house. He's still too young to enjoy the ropes but his toes (ahh! those toes!) they still show so much potential to be a rock climber. I think he has griper glue on them.....


Seeking out new playthings...

Poking his curious fingers into everything, everywhere

"hmm... how do i get onto this?"


Seeking out new playthings...

Poking his curious fingers into everything, everywhere

"hmm... how do i get onto this?"
Friday, November 07, 2008
Nuts- 2

So the Nuts have arrived...........they look and feel sticky and i can't wait to get them in the washing machine. But we didn't wash anything today.... tomorrow it shall be. To the test, soap nuts... and when i have MORE TIME....... (ah... that is a luxury) i shall start making my soap nut concoctions.
Monday, November 03, 2008
idle mind
ONE day... that's all it took for me to be glad that i am studying and working and being stressed out by it. Early this morning at 0034hrs, i submitted my second essay of the semester and went to bed. I woke up, a few hours later, wondering 'Hmm... what shall i do today?' In the end, the day melted away like butter on hot corn. It was fun, yes it was, playing ball with Val but after a while i really got restless and itched to get back to my studies. How SICK is that? LOL. really. and so, although i had declared a week of rest before the summer semester starts on 9 Nov, i actually went to the uni's distant learning website and began downloading study notes and readings! That experience brought a pleasurable tingle down my back.. Oooo i am turning into geeky mom. But truly, i really expected myself to veg out, relieved that the final essay was done but i didn't. So perhaps i was born to have a hard life - you know, the sorta life where one never really gets to rest, prefering to be occupied constantly. I need to be able to just chill and idle. That - i would say - is an art.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Baby on the loose...
Val's third trip to the library where he's let loose and takes off like a canon. He scurries away without a care after a feed, and heads straight for the section that's obviously not for him. Hey val, you're not 8 years old yet! Come back...

He decides to choose his own book. Picking them out with his fingers, and making a mess basically. He discovers the book ends and starts sliding the metal out of the nook, collapsing books. All the while as he leisurely 'picks' through the books, his frantic mama is busy putting the books back before the library 'auntie' spots the vandal in action.

The kind gentleman pauses long enough from his furtive search for a good book in order to let mama capture one steady shot with her mobile phone camera. Thank you.

He even goes over to the Parenting section and proceeds to pull out more books. Perhaps he is trying to drop me some hints????

This was the book he pulled out....
GULP...
Thursday, October 30, 2008
from babe to boy...

it seems like Val became a boy overnight. where did his baby days go? they're lost in a wild mess of crazy moments and now i can't find them anymore! thank goodness for the copious amount of photos i took in the first six months...
Suddenly, he understands us so much more. He points to the door to demand to go out. He protests if i throw a ball at his favourite fish wind chime and YES! he can PLAY BALL now which makes playing a lot more fun than before. He hurls his 8 little balls around the house, scoots around hunting for them, and then throws them whoever asks for them. It's funny when he flings them behind him instead.

Much as i hope he becomes a lil bookworm, i haven't been quite 'regimental' with the book reading. He doesn't pay attention to my bedtime stories anymore preferring to turn the pages faster than my reading so these days, i just scatter a few books on the bed and he'll browse through them, flipping the pages whilst muttering to himself. And of course, sometimes he's more absorbed by the box more than the books. Oh well... at least his mind is engaged.
Ah... time does fly! I am reminding myself to treasure each and every day before boy turns teen!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Confessions of a Coupon/Voucher mom
Okay I confess. i've become one of THOSE coupon/voucher moms. It's a nightmare but true.
I was no spendthrift before i became a mommy, in fact i saved quite a fair bit of my income but being single and having a reasonably good income, i never really kept a calculative tab on my spendings or looked for ways and means to reduce my savings.
These days? I've morphed into a coupon/voucher mom - ever on the lookout for useful discount coupons (Save $3 when you buy a pack of diapers! Save $5 when you buy a tin of mom's milk!) because they DO reduce costs despite how AUNTY they are. Really. I used to scoff at people who scan the papers for good discounts and turned up my nose at sales but now, er-hum, i DO take a second look and try to plan my shopping more strategically. Hey, having a baby can be EXPENSIVE business!
Besides hoarding coupons (I really don't have THAT many of them...), i've also observed that my stash of vouchers have grown. Vouchers from credit card spendings (my trusty Robinsons card gives $30 for every $4800 spent), vouchers from credit card referrals (I only have ONE referral and that was my sis but that got me $30 Tangs vouchers), and vouchers for my birthday ($100 for ZARA from my dearest sista who read my blog about me becoming a househag - thank you!). In my single days, those vouchers would have had NO chance of lingering in my wallet for sooo long. Before you can say 'shopping', they would have gone poof into thin air as i take to the malls to spend them. But now, sadly, even as the stash grows, i find that i have hardly any time to spare for shopping. No, the sport has become quite utilitarian - plan, go, grab, leave. This instrumental approach is either because i've got Val in my ergo and hence unable to try any clothes on, or he's in a stroller threatening a meltdown anytime, or my mom's taking care of him at home and that immeasurable guilt descends on me whenever i go out for meetings and feel tempted to swing by a mall for some mindless distraction.
I never was quite the shopper and so i am amazed how much i actually miss those idllyic days of going about malls on weekdays (! yes, i used to love my off days which always fell on weekdays and could beat the crowds), or those long afternoons at the bookstores, browsing books and savouring a cuppa coffee. My last trip at Borders was on Saturday when i sneakily went by after my (once a week) yoga session and had to give myself a time limit to grab 5 books before heading home. I was wracked by guilt for that extra time (which went from half an hour to an hour), apologising profusely by the time i got home. Oo and guess what, in my i bought a motherhood magazine because it gave away a cute baby hat. Arggh....
Luckily, all's not lost. Thanks to the internet, i've found a new realm of shopping experience via the 01101010101 codes. I've gone international and have not regretted. They are really some great finds online and international shipping rates have dropped a fair bit. And hey, in that virtual world, there're also ways to reduce costs! Consummate internet shoppers have taught me to 'google' for discount codes before making a purchase, which can sometimes shave off as much as 20% from your total bill. And of course, keeping in mind that one of my credit cards gives DOUBLE points at certain times of the month or year means i now plan when to shop and also to pay for my bill from the university. Truly, i think i now qualify for the AUNTY Hall of Fame.
The only thing now for me to do is to make sure i don't become a virtual shopaholic because those credit card bills - ooo they can give you a big bite in your tush to remind you they're very real....
I was no spendthrift before i became a mommy, in fact i saved quite a fair bit of my income but being single and having a reasonably good income, i never really kept a calculative tab on my spendings or looked for ways and means to reduce my savings.
These days? I've morphed into a coupon/voucher mom - ever on the lookout for useful discount coupons (Save $3 when you buy a pack of diapers! Save $5 when you buy a tin of mom's milk!) because they DO reduce costs despite how AUNTY they are. Really. I used to scoff at people who scan the papers for good discounts and turned up my nose at sales but now, er-hum, i DO take a second look and try to plan my shopping more strategically. Hey, having a baby can be EXPENSIVE business!
Besides hoarding coupons (I really don't have THAT many of them...), i've also observed that my stash of vouchers have grown. Vouchers from credit card spendings (my trusty Robinsons card gives $30 for every $4800 spent), vouchers from credit card referrals (I only have ONE referral and that was my sis but that got me $30 Tangs vouchers), and vouchers for my birthday ($100 for ZARA from my dearest sista who read my blog about me becoming a househag - thank you!). In my single days, those vouchers would have had NO chance of lingering in my wallet for sooo long. Before you can say 'shopping', they would have gone poof into thin air as i take to the malls to spend them. But now, sadly, even as the stash grows, i find that i have hardly any time to spare for shopping. No, the sport has become quite utilitarian - plan, go, grab, leave. This instrumental approach is either because i've got Val in my ergo and hence unable to try any clothes on, or he's in a stroller threatening a meltdown anytime, or my mom's taking care of him at home and that immeasurable guilt descends on me whenever i go out for meetings and feel tempted to swing by a mall for some mindless distraction.
I never was quite the shopper and so i am amazed how much i actually miss those idllyic days of going about malls on weekdays (! yes, i used to love my off days which always fell on weekdays and could beat the crowds), or those long afternoons at the bookstores, browsing books and savouring a cuppa coffee. My last trip at Borders was on Saturday when i sneakily went by after my (once a week) yoga session and had to give myself a time limit to grab 5 books before heading home. I was wracked by guilt for that extra time (which went from half an hour to an hour), apologising profusely by the time i got home. Oo and guess what, in my i bought a motherhood magazine because it gave away a cute baby hat. Arggh....
Luckily, all's not lost. Thanks to the internet, i've found a new realm of shopping experience via the 01101010101 codes. I've gone international and have not regretted. They are really some great finds online and international shipping rates have dropped a fair bit. And hey, in that virtual world, there're also ways to reduce costs! Consummate internet shoppers have taught me to 'google' for discount codes before making a purchase, which can sometimes shave off as much as 20% from your total bill. And of course, keeping in mind that one of my credit cards gives DOUBLE points at certain times of the month or year means i now plan when to shop and also to pay for my bill from the university. Truly, i think i now qualify for the AUNTY Hall of Fame.
The only thing now for me to do is to make sure i don't become a virtual shopaholic because those credit card bills - ooo they can give you a big bite in your tush to remind you they're very real....
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Exploited WAHMS - stand up and be united!
Ok so Sher and I ranted on the phone this afternoon when we started on the topic of how much we were being paid for our freelance writing. PEANUTS.... really. We totally agree that those blasted magazines run by the two big media companies in Singapore are so absolutely exploiting us - WAHMS - work at home mums. Recently i was offered $300 for a 1200 word article - that's 25 cents per word. Very sad to think that this is how much they value our writing. So did i take up the job? YESSSS.... wait wait, it's not like i'm desperate for that moolah (note: they can take up mooonths to pay us); no, it's not that i don't have other writing assignments (note: i have a full time job AND studies); and NO... i am not stoopid, crazy or simply masochistic. The only reason i agreed was because the article is going to be about ALTERNATIVE birthing options - hey, that's my kind of thing and hey, this is a mainstream magazine and a great opportunity for me to brainwash some moms to be open minded and to try in my little way to let other moms know that birthing is not just about screaming your way to delivery. And so, i said yes.... and then no to two other assignments that were just simply too impossible for me to complete.
But that's the story of our lives. At least for some of us, cos i can't presume to speak on everyone's behalf. We write because we do enjoy learning new things, and because we're interested. But i think the mags believe that we're just desperate SAHMs (stay home moms) who have nothing else to do and so won't mind a LITTLE income on the side. Sher and I both agree that hey, that's not US. We were professionally trained in school, plus we are writing from actual experiences and we do pretty good research, AND we do write well (ya la.... this is trumpeting ourselves but hey, we need to stand up and be counted sometimes!). So we do deserve more respect.
And so why are we subjecting ourselves to such exploitation? WHY? Would things help if we unionise WAHMS who write? That's be a first in Singapore! But hey, at least set up a network and perhaps lobby for better rates? Would Singaporean WAHMs take up a stand? Or will they simply say "never mind, lah" and allow the mags to continue dumbing down our rates? Do our words really mean so little?
Do you know other WAHMS who write? Give a shout out! We could arrange a lunch out for WAHMS-WW (work@home moms who write) and see what brews...
But that's the story of our lives. At least for some of us, cos i can't presume to speak on everyone's behalf. We write because we do enjoy learning new things, and because we're interested. But i think the mags believe that we're just desperate SAHMs (stay home moms) who have nothing else to do and so won't mind a LITTLE income on the side. Sher and I both agree that hey, that's not US. We were professionally trained in school, plus we are writing from actual experiences and we do pretty good research, AND we do write well (ya la.... this is trumpeting ourselves but hey, we need to stand up and be counted sometimes!). So we do deserve more respect.
And so why are we subjecting ourselves to such exploitation? WHY? Would things help if we unionise WAHMS who write? That's be a first in Singapore! But hey, at least set up a network and perhaps lobby for better rates? Would Singaporean WAHMs take up a stand? Or will they simply say "never mind, lah" and allow the mags to continue dumbing down our rates? Do our words really mean so little?
Do you know other WAHMS who write? Give a shout out! We could arrange a lunch out for WAHMS-WW (work@home moms who write) and see what brews...
KO: Val 0, Swim 1
Friday, October 24, 2008
Ad nauseam
Can one get totally sick of doing something? I sure am feeling that way.......... i feel like my fingers are glued to the keyboard, my eyes oh they are sore, and my brains, my brains, my poor frazzled grey matter they are turning into mush..... I should be thankful really that words, they run quite freely from my fingers onto the typepad so when it comes to writing 3000 words essays for school, it's not that daunting a task as compared to someone else who might struggle even to fill 2 pages with text. Yet, it is the seeming ease that sets one up for the fall. You see, now my full time job is also all about words, AND that upcoming internship that i am negotiating with a women's organisation (this is to fulfill my masters requirements) will ALSO be about writing. Why? because every organisation needs a writer, they need stories about their work, and since it's something i do for a living, it's also the easy way out for me. i.e. it means i could possibly complete my 300 hours much more easily by doing something i am familiar with. BUT it also means i pigeon hole myself into a writer's square. It means i don't give myself the opportunity to learn another skill - i had wanted to intern at a women's organisation BECAUSE i want to learn more about advocacy, activism, and management of NGOs. But when you only have 24 hours a day, an energetic child who demands lots of your attention (which i willing give!), it means that a lot of the work is done after dark when the boy is finally asleep. and this means, i have to find the EASIEST way out of everything. and so....i fall back to relying on writing. i do hope the nausea never get so bad, it induces me to hurl
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
NUTS!
i'm NUTs about soapnuts! haven't even bought them but getting SOOOO excited just reading about them. I got to know about them a while ago but of course, tonight, being the night i'm supposed to study and get onto my second essay of the semester, i chose...er-hum... to procrastinate and went 'daydreaming' on internet (the connection is usually lousy at night, man... tonight, everything i clicked came on straight away! it's fate i reckon).
Anyways, if you haven't heard about soapnuts, go to this, and this websites amongst many others to read cos this is really supposed to be a SHORT blog and not wikipedia :-) Okay, so i'm about to buy my first bag of Soapnuts and then try to make soapnut liquid cleaners out of them (here's a recipe) - they can be used as shampoo, handwash, dishwashing cleaners, car wash, floor cleaners, pet shampoo, etc etc etc..... ANYTHING that needs cleansing really.......I promise that if my experiment works, i shall get more, and give out bottles of this all-natural cleaner to friends keen to have a greener option in their household.
I'm also suggesting that my sis, who has tasked me to find 'green' wedding favours for her big do, to buy the soap nuts and i'll round up a few friends to package them into soap nut bags. Of course, the words on the card would be "WE'RE NUTS ABOUT EACH OTHER!" cheesy right? but soooooo cool too... Soap Nuts Soap nuts.. Soap Nuts... i'm gonna dream about them tonight...(p/s: there's even a soapnut library online!)
I hope the bag i buy will have a few seeds too.... then maybe i can plant my own soap nut bush...
Anyways, if you haven't heard about soapnuts, go to this, and this websites amongst many others to read cos this is really supposed to be a SHORT blog and not wikipedia :-) Okay, so i'm about to buy my first bag of Soapnuts and then try to make soapnut liquid cleaners out of them (here's a recipe) - they can be used as shampoo, handwash, dishwashing cleaners, car wash, floor cleaners, pet shampoo, etc etc etc..... ANYTHING that needs cleansing really.......I promise that if my experiment works, i shall get more, and give out bottles of this all-natural cleaner to friends keen to have a greener option in their household.
I'm also suggesting that my sis, who has tasked me to find 'green' wedding favours for her big do, to buy the soap nuts and i'll round up a few friends to package them into soap nut bags. Of course, the words on the card would be "WE'RE NUTS ABOUT EACH OTHER!" cheesy right? but soooooo cool too... Soap Nuts Soap nuts.. Soap Nuts... i'm gonna dream about them tonight...(p/s: there's even a soapnut library online!)
I hope the bag i buy will have a few seeds too.... then maybe i can plant my own soap nut bush...
Thursday, October 16, 2008
tree tree
and so i turned 33 today....
i had a hair cut in order to snip away all those feelings of haggardness... i know it'll take more than that - a visit to the dentist is still pending, and of course, a relook at my terribly outdated wardrobe. you see, when you have lived in a dusty little citadel tucked away in Asia's corner where everyone else you are close to live out of a suitcase, you start to forget a lil about fashion trends and are content to just rotate your clothes according to which are washed and which are not ironed. Now that i am back in THE CITY, i sometimes feel a bit like my friends' domestic helper when i go out with them, with Val in tow.... Yikes. Anyways, that project - of updating wardrobe- remains a thought until i have a spare moment and LOTS more moolah which i do not possess at this time. Treated my folks - who are THE WORLD'S BEST PARENTS - to japanese buffet to thank them for all the happiness they have given me and for standing by me unfailingly in every instance of my short little life. Being a parent now, i guess i can finally begin to appreciate all the concern they had for me, which were always disguised with lots of nagging. Man... it's tough being a parent - you never know how your kid will turn out even if you try your darnest. And so.... what have i achieved in the past year? I created a life - which i must say, is QUITE an achievement don't ya think? ;-O
my new old stroller

so this is one photo that deserves a special mention because it captures a historic moment. It's the first, uno, primeiro, time that Mr "I hate my stroller" Lay slept in his "new secondhand/old stroller" that I got off a motherhood forum for $55. I had put him in after he fell asleep from nursing. (yeah, yeah i can hear all you Tracy Hogg fans out there "tsk tsk-ing" away for letting him fall asleep at the breast...)
Val has NEVER fallen asleep in a stroller, rather he views them with a strong suspicion so he is never relaxed in one, but super alert, and always checking and making sure mommy's not going to run away and thus strives to stay awake no matter how tired he is. The previous stroller which was a hand-me-down from a cousin had only a three point harness which val learnt how to get out of and would stand precariously on it. A few times, when i looked away, he was already up and hanging onto the handle bars threatening to topple it. So i had no choice but to go online looking for a cheap stroller with 5-point harness. He's smart. Once he acquainted himself with this one, he realised that there's simply no escape for Baby Houdini and thus he has actually learnt to deal with it. Of course i need to ply him with a range of different distractions, and once in a while take him out of it for a cuddle.
Yesterday i took him for a 45 min walk in the stroller, i was definitely ready for a nap after but my lil man, who was yawning non-stop, still fought off the ZZZ monster while in the machine. Although he did sleep for an hour on the bed right after......
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Virgin cut

We both desperately needed haircuts but Val got his virgin cut courtesy of our next-door neighbour who has FOUR kids of her own. The expert hairstylist held his head firmly, shaving off his hair which was not very much to begin with but he did have a Tin Tin sorta lock that was pretty cute. I was expecting the lil man to bawl but all he did was to cling on tight and tried to use his free hand to push her away. Her four kids came in useful... they kept coming around to shove toys at Val to distract him. Grandma proved to be quite a good photographer!
Here we go....
Mommy, what's that strange buzzing noise on my head?
Val's whorls....
Rescue me, mom!
Yikes, i dun like my new look but i'm sure ready for some Shaolin Kungfu!
Monday, October 06, 2008
kudos to Deakin
I have to blog this. I have to put it on record that i am so darn glad that i decided to pursue my masters degree with Deakin Uni. When i first started out, it was meant to be my part-time studies while working in Timor, to marry my on-the-ground work with theory. Just after i started my first sem, i realised that i was pregnant and was really scared if i could finish off this 12-credit programme or not. I managed to complete my first semester, working, pregnant and studying two modules. I was soooo tired but it was so interesting and i was rewarded for my hard work with pretty decent grades. For my second semester, i was into my second trimester too, and decided to study only one module. Halfway through, just before my first essay was due, i was down with chicken pox and being in Timor with no broadband home internet access, i had to drop out of the course while being grounded for two weeks in a hot stuffy container home. My lecturer was super understanding, as well as the school administration. With a few emails plus doctor's letter, my entire course fee for that module was waived and that took off a great weight from my mind, and allowed me to carry on my pregnancy without more worries. After Val was born, i courageously/crazily/stupidly took on two modules again - i have no idea how i got through that! Looking back, it's still a patch of haze --- i somehow stumbled through that, and still managed to write freelance for 2 magazines then.
This semester, i had some bad stuff going on in my family, plus i was relocating to Timor, and then found that i had to relocate back to Singapore, all whilst my studies had started. I was filled with so much anguish, and dilemma wondering if i should intermit this semester seeing that i had hardly touched my books. Finally, once i was back in Singapore, i emailed my lecturer and told him what happened. He was so encouraging, and told me to carry on, while giving me a 2-week grace for my first essay. His words really touched me and motivated me to hang in there. There was empathy with capital E, really. Something i really needed at a time of darkness. Recently i got back that essay which i had very bad feelings about - - and got a really decent grade on it! MY ma joked - "Either you're really talented in studying or your university is really easy!" Haha ... okay laugh on. It's not funny at all when you seriously think about it. My ma was witness to my agony in completing the essay. She saw how far behind i was, and how i struggled with a teething baby to try to study and write at home. She is amazed by my grade. So am I.... All i can say is that the person grading my paper really did not penalise my lateness. And i thank her for that. My Ma is also very touched by the university, particularly my lecturer, saying that they are really so encouraging, and accepting of all the struggles that working adult students have while studying. I guess, sometimes when life cuts us some slack, it does feel great, especially when you're genuinely trying your best. That's what i think my lecturer does. He knows that every student of his - - some of them in far flung places, with no internet, with children, working full time, some dealing with war, others dealing with personal home issues --- is trying his/her best. And he accepts that. He doesn't tell you - - that's YOUR personal life, don't tell me about it. He accepts that your personal life does affect your academic life. And so, i am touched and so very glad that i made my choice to stick with Deakin. Thank You PHIL CONNOR.
Last semester I had the privilege to study online with Damien Kingsbury, a rather wellknown academic who specialises in Timor. He was also the advisor to the GAM team that brokered the Aceh Peace Deal and had written a book about the negotiations. Despite his busy schedule, flying here and there during the semester, he was still very much 'present' online, answering questions all the time. It was very interesting to see how such an arrangement allows us to benefit from lecturers who would otherwise not be able to physically teach but have a wealth of knowledge to share. During the course, he had even attended a meeting that discussed the possibility of brokering a peace deal for the Tamil tigers and Sri Lankan government. Made all the studying of regional conflicts come alive. I also had Matthew Clarke for my Microfinance unit - he had himself run an NGO in microfinance so once again, we got a lot out of him - from people who are practitioners and are NOT just academics cloistered in their libraries.
Recently the school has continued to innovate its online course -- adding in a 4-credit dissertation that spans 2 semesters, plus option to take Bahasa Indonesia via the internet which is just evidence of what a progressive university is all about. They are ATTUNED to what working students want. Kudos again, Deakin!
This semester, i had some bad stuff going on in my family, plus i was relocating to Timor, and then found that i had to relocate back to Singapore, all whilst my studies had started. I was filled with so much anguish, and dilemma wondering if i should intermit this semester seeing that i had hardly touched my books. Finally, once i was back in Singapore, i emailed my lecturer and told him what happened. He was so encouraging, and told me to carry on, while giving me a 2-week grace for my first essay. His words really touched me and motivated me to hang in there. There was empathy with capital E, really. Something i really needed at a time of darkness. Recently i got back that essay which i had very bad feelings about - - and got a really decent grade on it! MY ma joked - "Either you're really talented in studying or your university is really easy!" Haha ... okay laugh on. It's not funny at all when you seriously think about it. My ma was witness to my agony in completing the essay. She saw how far behind i was, and how i struggled with a teething baby to try to study and write at home. She is amazed by my grade. So am I.... All i can say is that the person grading my paper really did not penalise my lateness. And i thank her for that. My Ma is also very touched by the university, particularly my lecturer, saying that they are really so encouraging, and accepting of all the struggles that working adult students have while studying. I guess, sometimes when life cuts us some slack, it does feel great, especially when you're genuinely trying your best. That's what i think my lecturer does. He knows that every student of his - - some of them in far flung places, with no internet, with children, working full time, some dealing with war, others dealing with personal home issues --- is trying his/her best. And he accepts that. He doesn't tell you - - that's YOUR personal life, don't tell me about it. He accepts that your personal life does affect your academic life. And so, i am touched and so very glad that i made my choice to stick with Deakin. Thank You PHIL CONNOR.
Last semester I had the privilege to study online with Damien Kingsbury, a rather wellknown academic who specialises in Timor. He was also the advisor to the GAM team that brokered the Aceh Peace Deal and had written a book about the negotiations. Despite his busy schedule, flying here and there during the semester, he was still very much 'present' online, answering questions all the time. It was very interesting to see how such an arrangement allows us to benefit from lecturers who would otherwise not be able to physically teach but have a wealth of knowledge to share. During the course, he had even attended a meeting that discussed the possibility of brokering a peace deal for the Tamil tigers and Sri Lankan government. Made all the studying of regional conflicts come alive. I also had Matthew Clarke for my Microfinance unit - he had himself run an NGO in microfinance so once again, we got a lot out of him - from people who are practitioners and are NOT just academics cloistered in their libraries.
Recently the school has continued to innovate its online course -- adding in a 4-credit dissertation that spans 2 semesters, plus option to take Bahasa Indonesia via the internet which is just evidence of what a progressive university is all about. They are ATTUNED to what working students want. Kudos again, Deakin!
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
i'm blogging because i have a deadline and i need to distract myself

ironic how the more pressing a deadline, the more the need to be distracted by the million and one thing the worldwideweb offers. So i just spent the afternoon trying to finish an article, while surfing for Klean Kanteens, Built NY neoprene insulation covers, and other cool stuff i am tempted to buy because online shopping is simply toooooo easy these days. Thank goodness i do not live in america otherwise i would be one of those with multiple credit card debts. Anyways, i have decided not to buy anything for now, after looking at last month's bill.
and the photo? Nothing to do with how cute Val is because that's already a given. i just like it because my arms don't look flabby here. Muahahahaha.... although i do look pasty-white thanks to the mineral sunblock i had slapped on. Bah... back to the grind...
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
have baby, will travel

Not the most adventurous picture but you get the point. I'm counting down the days when i can really travel travel , as in go overseas with passport, trekking gear, and hoist Val up to a vantage point, shower under a waterfall, climb over crags, walk into valleys, scrabble over mountains, stand atop peaks, hide under a rainforest canopy, hunt for strawberries, snorkel with the sharks, freefall from a plane....For starters, I hope to celebrate his first year by bringing him on a trip to cameron highland with some friends who have promised to 'babysit' him for me. Can't wait....
val on the go
we visited great grandma today, to her delight of course. and he was thrilled to see an ultra big ceiling fan and kept pointing to it, with his index finger and thumb splayed out in the cutest baby style -- babies are cutest when they haven't mastered how to do things the adult way. Back home, because i've refused to buy a walker for Val (for all the bad press about them) and he absolutely feels the instinctive need to move around with support, he has naturally gravitated to pushing around the high chair, his stroller, the baby sarong structure, plus the pink gym ball. It's backache time for us all as we try to help him by keeping a safe distance behind. Ouch....
Monday, September 29, 2008
my little man
Val's picking up new words too. Of course he can't say anything, but we know he knows what they are cos he looks at things we call out. Like with 'fish' he turns to our windchime that has an assortment of wooden fish, the same with 'fan', 'sarong', and 'ball'. I play the Your Baby Can Read video every morning after his bath time cos it's the only thing that keeps him still long enough for me to put on his clothes. Two days ago, when the children in the video said 'point' and a baby demonstrated the action, Val also raised his right hand and pointed his finger to point! it was very funny. and since then, he does that without fail whenever Baby Lauren (that's the baby who points her finger) appears. It's weird how there are some words he picks up very fast, some he just never. Like the word 'Star', i pointed out the neon glow-in-the-dark stars i have on our ceiling one night, and he caught on immediately but he just can't figure out where's my nose, ears, eyes and mouth. Anyways, he'll do so in his own time. It's just funny to see his antics.
But it ain't so funny when it comes to eating and sleeping. He loves his organic cereal but screams and cries each time he is put in his high chair. Even the belt on the chair doesn't seem to contain him. Lately, he's developed a very bad habit of wanting to crawl around and eat. grrr...... it's a battle each time we feed him. As for sleeping............that's his biggest enemy. he now refuses to get into the sarong for day naps, he would twist and sit up and threaten to topple out of the sarong altogether. very dangerous. Yah, i never got round to the whole 'cry it out' sleep training i guess. But really, he can cry and cry for a LOOOOONG time without yielding. a few nights ago, he cried from midnight till 3 am for god-knows-what reasons, and then finally i had to offer the breast before he would sleep again................ARGGH.... these days, i just don't fight it anymore. when he wakes up at night, i just shove my boob to him and he's back at sleep quickly. Honestly i really don't have the energy to battle it out with him. So i do look on at envy at those moms who blog about their babies sleeping through the night....... i just have to accept that Val's just going to do that at his own time.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
on raising a healthy child
the recent milk scandal in China once again reminds us of how much contaminants there are in almost every aspect of our life. This time it's melamime, but recently studies have also shown that polycarbonate, a plastic commonly used for milk bottles, contains the hormone-disrupting Biphesonol-A. Although i am a breastfeeding proponent, i am also well aware of the possible toxicity in breastmilk especially if the mom has been exposed to lots of pollutants and say, lead a relatively unhealthy lifestyle such as smoking. Some studies on breast milk have shown that mom's milk can have contaminants such as flame retardants, pesticides, toilet deodoriser, and dry-cleaning fluids! This is only natural since whatever mommy ingests, eventually baby does too. So, although we don't gulp down dry-cleaning fluids or sip the toilet deodoriser, the chemicals can be breathed in and makes its way into the breast milk. That said, however, breast fed children still tend to be healthier and less prone to cancer because of the antiseptic qualities in the milk.
That's why it's timely that just as the milk scandal surfaced, the book i ordered from the NGO "Healthy child healthy world" finally lands at my place. Great timing. This little book is chockful of great resources and insights on how to make our homes and our lifestyle so much 'cleaner, greener and safer' for the little tots. In fact, many of the contributors remark that their children's asthma improved greatly once they began removing chemicals from their homes. Goes to show how much chemicals that are insidiously penetrating our children's fragile systems.
After reading it, It has greatly strengthened my resolve to slowly, bit by bit, introduce more natural products into the home. I sure can't afford to overnight become a 100% organic eater, but there are some things that i believe will make a difference.
What i have already begun to do:
1. use more cloth diapers than disposables, and try to toilet train him asap: since the chemicals inside the diapers were banned from women's tampons years ago... surely can't be good to keep val's jewels in close contact with these questionable chemicals 24/.7.
2. Organic shampoo & bodywash for Val (only) that are free from all the questionable chemicals/ preservatives like parabens,phosphates, pthalates and sulfates. (i'm still thinking twice about switching to organic stuff for me since it's more expensive for adults - we have bigger surface area!)
3. water wipes 99% of the time, instead of wet wipes ---- in a bid to cut costs on buying wet wipes, i inadvertently switched to just water and reusable cotton cloths. means, we save the environment and also reduce val's bum from too much contact with chemicals and preservatives.
4. begin buying wooden toys --- using sustainable wood and non toxic paints. also, i read that if you use a lot of plastic toys, at least ensure that the toys are well-aired before first use since they emit a lot of harmful toxins in the air when newly unwrapped.
5. use deet-free insect repellent that instead relies on natural plant remedies to ward off the mossies -- so far worked pretty well in timor. just gotta reapply often. luckily i also used very little deet insect repellent while pregnant.
6. frozen washcloths as teethers --- they have worked well, and i think i'm gonna junk the other plastic ones since i'm unsure what kind of plastics they were made from
7. buy organic oat, rice, barley cereal for Val --- i'm junking the other questionable food stuffs that were bought for him, e.g. nestle's teething biscuits. will henceforth buy only organic titbits for him. will be more expensive but.....
8. switched to using BPA-free drinking cups from SteadyCo (you can buy them at Robinsons i think), and BPA-free utensils from IKEA. And we serve hot porridge or cereal in porcelain bowls, but make sure they are well out of Val's reach.
What i plan to do next:
1. Floor cleaning liquids -- this is first on my hit list. Since Val is crawling around so much, it now makes sense to invest some $$$ into organic or at least less chemically-enhanced floor liquids.
2. go back to using baby-detergent --- okay, so i used to think it was all hype -- to sell more expensive baby detergents to paranoid parents but it is all worth it! look for baby or organic detergents that are free from harmful phosphates, phtalates, etc
3. unpack the steam cleaning machine that's still in the box --- it was given free but we've yet to use it.
4. hunt around the house, and eliminate plastic toys, plates, eating utensils made from PVC (No.3), Polystyrene (no.5), and Others (usually polycarbonate #7 )... luckily our family hardly heats up food in the microwave using plastics, we are a 'Corning ware' family haha.
4. decide what to do with those new Avent bottles i've got --- they are polycarbonate, and hence may leach toxins when heated. hmmm... they were quite expensive! and new! but Val still refuses to nurse from a bottle --- maybe his instincts are really better than mine?
5. try to convince my dad to stop spraying insecticide??? this is the difficult one. how? we do grow many citronella plants but they're all outside the house. although we don't have much of a mossie problem, but my dad still occasionally nukes the room
6...
7...
8....
LOts more to do, but the trick is to go slow and do it at a natural pace otherwise, it may freak out everyone else in the home!
One visible trend that's happening these days is that i do see more people using those fibre bags instead of plastic bags for their groceries. It provoked a discussion i had with my dad over plastic bags and how we now live so dangerously by packing foods in plastic bags whereas in their time, they had to bring their own tiffin to the hawker stall. These days, our family also tries to do that. If we know we're going to packet some food, we try to bring our own metal container. it does take effort no doubt.
From the book "Healthy child healthy world" p.g 95
DID YOU KNOW... that nonstick pans use a chemical called PFOA (dun ask me what's the actual spelling) that is now found "in the blood of nearly every American and has been listed by the EPA (America's environmental protection agency) as a 'likely human carcinogen'. Apparently Dupont and 7 other companies have agreed to stop using PFOA in their pans by 2015.
Oh, and one last thing....
the latest craze in the housecleaning department is apparent the microfiber cloth! This is the same same same fabric that our sports towel is made of -- you know the ubiquitous blue sports towel with a terry cloth feel and is highly absorbent? well, microfiber is now being touted as one of the most effective cleaning aid in the home since dust clings to it easily until washed. Incidentally, all of Val's diaper inserts are made of the same material. which means when he outgrows his diaper inserts, and if i can't sell them off second hand, there will be plenty of microfiber cloths handy at home!
Some great websites with a focus on cleaner, greener, safer living:
1. Environmental working group
2. Z recommends
3. Mothering magazine
4. Healthy Toys (A website that lets you check for toxic toys)
That's why it's timely that just as the milk scandal surfaced, the book i ordered from the NGO "Healthy child healthy world" finally lands at my place. Great timing. This little book is chockful of great resources and insights on how to make our homes and our lifestyle so much 'cleaner, greener and safer' for the little tots. In fact, many of the contributors remark that their children's asthma improved greatly once they began removing chemicals from their homes. Goes to show how much chemicals that are insidiously penetrating our children's fragile systems.
After reading it, It has greatly strengthened my resolve to slowly, bit by bit, introduce more natural products into the home. I sure can't afford to overnight become a 100% organic eater, but there are some things that i believe will make a difference.
What i have already begun to do:
1. use more cloth diapers than disposables, and try to toilet train him asap: since the chemicals inside the diapers were banned from women's tampons years ago... surely can't be good to keep val's jewels in close contact with these questionable chemicals 24/.7.
2. Organic shampoo & bodywash for Val (only) that are free from all the questionable chemicals/ preservatives like parabens,phosphates, pthalates and sulfates. (i'm still thinking twice about switching to organic stuff for me since it's more expensive for adults - we have bigger surface area!)
3. water wipes 99% of the time, instead of wet wipes ---- in a bid to cut costs on buying wet wipes, i inadvertently switched to just water and reusable cotton cloths. means, we save the environment and also reduce val's bum from too much contact with chemicals and preservatives.
4. begin buying wooden toys --- using sustainable wood and non toxic paints. also, i read that if you use a lot of plastic toys, at least ensure that the toys are well-aired before first use since they emit a lot of harmful toxins in the air when newly unwrapped.
5. use deet-free insect repellent that instead relies on natural plant remedies to ward off the mossies -- so far worked pretty well in timor. just gotta reapply often. luckily i also used very little deet insect repellent while pregnant.
6. frozen washcloths as teethers --- they have worked well, and i think i'm gonna junk the other plastic ones since i'm unsure what kind of plastics they were made from
7. buy organic oat, rice, barley cereal for Val --- i'm junking the other questionable food stuffs that were bought for him, e.g. nestle's teething biscuits. will henceforth buy only organic titbits for him. will be more expensive but.....
8. switched to using BPA-free drinking cups from SteadyCo (you can buy them at Robinsons i think), and BPA-free utensils from IKEA. And we serve hot porridge or cereal in porcelain bowls, but make sure they are well out of Val's reach.
What i plan to do next:
1. Floor cleaning liquids -- this is first on my hit list. Since Val is crawling around so much, it now makes sense to invest some $$$ into organic or at least less chemically-enhanced floor liquids.
2. go back to using baby-detergent --- okay, so i used to think it was all hype -- to sell more expensive baby detergents to paranoid parents but it is all worth it! look for baby or organic detergents that are free from harmful phosphates, phtalates, etc
3. unpack the steam cleaning machine that's still in the box --- it was given free but we've yet to use it.
4. hunt around the house, and eliminate plastic toys, plates, eating utensils made from PVC (No.3), Polystyrene (no.5), and Others (usually polycarbonate #7 )... luckily our family hardly heats up food in the microwave using plastics, we are a 'Corning ware' family haha.
4. decide what to do with those new Avent bottles i've got --- they are polycarbonate, and hence may leach toxins when heated. hmmm... they were quite expensive! and new! but Val still refuses to nurse from a bottle --- maybe his instincts are really better than mine?
5. try to convince my dad to stop spraying insecticide??? this is the difficult one. how? we do grow many citronella plants but they're all outside the house. although we don't have much of a mossie problem, but my dad still occasionally nukes the room
6...
7...
8....
LOts more to do, but the trick is to go slow and do it at a natural pace otherwise, it may freak out everyone else in the home!
One visible trend that's happening these days is that i do see more people using those fibre bags instead of plastic bags for their groceries. It provoked a discussion i had with my dad over plastic bags and how we now live so dangerously by packing foods in plastic bags whereas in their time, they had to bring their own tiffin to the hawker stall. These days, our family also tries to do that. If we know we're going to packet some food, we try to bring our own metal container. it does take effort no doubt.
From the book "Healthy child healthy world" p.g 95
DID YOU KNOW... that nonstick pans use a chemical called PFOA (dun ask me what's the actual spelling) that is now found "in the blood of nearly every American and has been listed by the EPA (America's environmental protection agency) as a 'likely human carcinogen'. Apparently Dupont and 7 other companies have agreed to stop using PFOA in their pans by 2015.
Oh, and one last thing....
the latest craze in the housecleaning department is apparent the microfiber cloth! This is the same same same fabric that our sports towel is made of -- you know the ubiquitous blue sports towel with a terry cloth feel and is highly absorbent? well, microfiber is now being touted as one of the most effective cleaning aid in the home since dust clings to it easily until washed. Incidentally, all of Val's diaper inserts are made of the same material. which means when he outgrows his diaper inserts, and if i can't sell them off second hand, there will be plenty of microfiber cloths handy at home!
Some great websites with a focus on cleaner, greener, safer living:
1. Environmental working group
2. Z recommends
3. Mothering magazine
4. Healthy Toys (A website that lets you check for toxic toys)
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
balancing act
today i submitted my Community Development essay 2 weeks after the official submission date. i'm not used to submitting things late but still that was the easy part. the tough part was to accept that the essay was the best i could have done under the circumstances,because i felt completely lousy about the shoddy job i had done with it. I guess i'm still trying to come to terms with the fact that when a child comes into the picture, something just gonna give -- for the career folks, it may mean trying to end work on time and accepting that they can't push all the way as they used to, and for me now, it means just having to accept that my papers may not be as well-researched or written as before. Sigh. it's not easy.
And things are likely to get scarier soon as i've just been officially offered a job and i've accepted it. It's a full-time job as a sub-editor of a new website specialising in BUSINESS news in CHINESE. Gulp.....I have never had the brains for business stuff, let alone in Chinese so it must have been divine intervention that possessed the chief editor to hire me. Anyways the job pays rather well (not too far off from my CNA days) and it allows me to stay home and work during hours that are suitable. Sounds ideal? on the surface yeah. it means i save time on commuting, i get to see Val during the day, and i don't have to squeeze with others on public transport. But the downside is that i inadvertently end up doing house chores, taking care of Val sometimes, bathing him etc, while having to still work and study. It's like the invisible hand of work creeps up, and it means i have to spend afterwork hours working and my days and nights are jumbled up. I do get CPF (something i haven't had for a few years) but i don't think i get medical leave and other perks that normal salaried employees get. I didn't even bother asking. i guess i was just too overjoyed to be offered a job that somehow allows me to study and also care for Val.
My mind's also preoccupied with how i can finish up my Masters faster since i am progressing at a pace slower than a snail. At this rate, i'll still be swotting at the books come 2010. One of the faster options is to take on a 2-credit internship with an NGO which means getting 2 credits without having to write any essays..but it does mean putting in 300 hours at an NGO AND pay the university more than S$4000 for it! Yikes. what to do........i'm desperate to chock up the credits. I need 12, and so far, have only gotten 5 credits. That's the other thing... if i do the internship, it means i have to FIND the time to do it, PLUS fulfill my full-time work requirements AND Val??? Anyways, i hope to somehow do it next year when the little man's one year and i can go easy on the breastfeeding which means i could possibly juggle work and internship.
Worries worries worries....my grey hairs are multiplying...
I just tell myself to Breathe deeply and then remember to take it ONE DAY AT A TIME.
At least Mr Valente 'Smellybottom' Lay never fails to put a smile on my face especially now that he is tottering around and being Mr Inquisitive.
And things are likely to get scarier soon as i've just been officially offered a job and i've accepted it. It's a full-time job as a sub-editor of a new website specialising in BUSINESS news in CHINESE. Gulp.....I have never had the brains for business stuff, let alone in Chinese so it must have been divine intervention that possessed the chief editor to hire me. Anyways the job pays rather well (not too far off from my CNA days) and it allows me to stay home and work during hours that are suitable. Sounds ideal? on the surface yeah. it means i save time on commuting, i get to see Val during the day, and i don't have to squeeze with others on public transport. But the downside is that i inadvertently end up doing house chores, taking care of Val sometimes, bathing him etc, while having to still work and study. It's like the invisible hand of work creeps up, and it means i have to spend afterwork hours working and my days and nights are jumbled up. I do get CPF (something i haven't had for a few years) but i don't think i get medical leave and other perks that normal salaried employees get. I didn't even bother asking. i guess i was just too overjoyed to be offered a job that somehow allows me to study and also care for Val.
My mind's also preoccupied with how i can finish up my Masters faster since i am progressing at a pace slower than a snail. At this rate, i'll still be swotting at the books come 2010. One of the faster options is to take on a 2-credit internship with an NGO which means getting 2 credits without having to write any essays..but it does mean putting in 300 hours at an NGO AND pay the university more than S$4000 for it! Yikes. what to do........i'm desperate to chock up the credits. I need 12, and so far, have only gotten 5 credits. That's the other thing... if i do the internship, it means i have to FIND the time to do it, PLUS fulfill my full-time work requirements AND Val??? Anyways, i hope to somehow do it next year when the little man's one year and i can go easy on the breastfeeding which means i could possibly juggle work and internship.
Worries worries worries....my grey hairs are multiplying...
I just tell myself to Breathe deeply and then remember to take it ONE DAY AT A TIME.
At least Mr Valente 'Smellybottom' Lay never fails to put a smile on my face especially now that he is tottering around and being Mr Inquisitive.
Monday, August 25, 2008
lemme out.......
Unstoppable Val now crawls at the speed of lightning, enjoys chasing after ants, and terrorising dogs, and laments at the gate when no one wants to bring him out. Sike. Actually, this is just him feeling a bit helpless after he had pulled himself up, and then discovered he didn't know what next to do. He was scared of landing plop on his bum so he just held on for his dear life until grandma rescued him and gently taught him to land on his bum. Of course, knocks are quite common these days. Not one day go by without the munchkin hitting his coconut on something.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
back in action
Many things happened in the past month... too complex to explain... just wanted to finally blog that Val is now expert-crawler and also have started to 'cruise'. He has also discovered a penchant for MY toes, so if i don't pay attention, he'll sink his sharp teeth into them! He now has 4 teeth, with 2 more popping out which are giving him lots of pain and waking him up from his naps. Poor thang. The munchkin is babbling lots too --- babababa, mamamaa, dadada... he likes the fish windchime we have so whenever we say 'fish' he looks up at it. Sometimes he cranes his neck up too high, and then topples over. Have not weighed him since he was 6 months old, but i suspect he hasn't gained much weight considering the high energy level he has and that he DOES NOT STOP once he wakes up.
Here's a funny photo of him after he plopped face down on the beach in Jimbaran. That was also his first mouthful of gritty sand. pwppppt... And doesn't he look grown up???
Saturday, July 05, 2008
ready....get set ....
been a crazy week trying to sort out all kinds of things before getting onto that jet plane to Dili.... today i even made a trip down to ShunLi Industrial Park to grab a mossie buster after they sold out at Parkway Parade. The things parents do for their kids.. Sigh.. i am only just beginning to realise that now.... But at least, i have one less worry about Val catching dengue or malaria - both very nasty illnesses and totally preventable. There's no way he should be eating any prophylaxis and he can't be creamed with repellent (even though its deet free and child-friendly and organic!) 24/7, so this mossie buster is our best hope. i do hope it kills those awful things! Most of my friends' children (the local babes) are veteran sufferers of both the mossie diseases and they re-infect so regularly, it's scary. So i really don't want Val to be bitten at all. So far i myself have been lucky in my 2.5 years there i've never (*touch wood*) been stung by a dengue/malaria-carrying mossie.
I started packing today and there's soooo much to bring --- in my mind - visions of a very bored and thus cranky Val scares me to bits. How will i ever keep the lil un entertained? should i bring all the toys he has inherited with him or leave it to the intervention of God? Should we bring the sturdy old stroller we were given or buy a new and lightweight one? How about his food? How much of the oatmeal/ brown rice should we pack along? Questions questions questions. I may be a veteran backpacker but this time i'm really rather overwhelmed by this whole baby packing thing. what about a high chair? i never thought to check out these things in Dili whilst i was pregnant. arggh... i guess the stroller will suffice.
anyways, just 2 more days to say goodbye once more to the creature comforts of home to the dusty streets of Dili...
I started packing today and there's soooo much to bring --- in my mind - visions of a very bored and thus cranky Val scares me to bits. How will i ever keep the lil un entertained? should i bring all the toys he has inherited with him or leave it to the intervention of God? Should we bring the sturdy old stroller we were given or buy a new and lightweight one? How about his food? How much of the oatmeal/ brown rice should we pack along? Questions questions questions. I may be a veteran backpacker but this time i'm really rather overwhelmed by this whole baby packing thing. what about a high chair? i never thought to check out these things in Dili whilst i was pregnant. arggh... i guess the stroller will suffice.
anyways, just 2 more days to say goodbye once more to the creature comforts of home to the dusty streets of Dili...
Thursday, June 26, 2008
question mark
been feeling that way a lot these days.... you see, we're getting ready to go 'home' to Dili where A is. so happy to do so cos Val is finally done with his basic immunisations plus one more yucky dose of rotavirus and one more very painful shot for pneumococcal meningitis next week. And i'm done with my studies this semester. this gives us no more excuses to be hanging about on sunny island, and only all the right reasons to be going back to our dusty yet lovable half-island. i guess, i've never been responsible for another person , let alone a baby, during my more adventurous days. it was always - let's eat whatever and if i get the runs so be it, or let's try this route cos i've never done it before without much consideration of safety etc. now, it's quite a different ballgame. i'm bringing my SON (gosh that sounds all still so weird) back to cowboy town Dili. i know a lot of malaes (expats) do it, and i think they're so brave. Am i brave? not really. just that my husband is there so what can we do? i don't like the separation, and marriages aren't supposed to be long distance so i just GOTTA go. i won't have the comfort of my folks to help me out daily so this will really be a true test of my courage as i will have to look after Val full-time, and study on top of that, plus run the house. i'm getting serious cooold cooold feet just thinking of the future. i know i will survive - that i'm sure, but i don't know what kinda train wreck the experience might leave me. haha. i may really become a 'desperate housewife'. so yeah, i'm scared. scared too cos there are really so many things to be scared about there ---
mossies for one - so many babies and children get malaria and dengue, it's not funny. how should i be protecting val? i can't slather mossie repellent on him 24/7 or cage him under a mossie net all the time. or worse, put him on prophylaxis - no way. so? just try my best and hope that he will emerge unscathed. water --- yup, the water's not the cleanest so i just bought a water filter that promises to kill 99.99% of germs - i'm skeptical but at least it assuages my conscience. health--- the hospital isn't all that great but it's improving, so i am now buying extended health insurance for him, just so that if (cross all fingers and touch all the wood) anything happens, his hospitalisation in very expensive Darwin will be covered for. development--- i'm going to pack as many toys and books i possibly can with me so that he will at least have stuff to occupy him during times when i need to study, cook, wash clothes, etc etc etc. Yikes.... I guess it probably won't be THAT bad... i'm probably just imagining the worst. but that's better for me, you know, expect the worse, and maybe get something not so bad...
there's a new airline Austasia that's introducing a direct flight to Dili from here. that's the good news. the bad news is that it costs as much as before when i had to fly to Bali and then to Dili. i guess there's the hotel stay saved, and the indo taxes etc, and of course the hassle if u travelling with kids. BUT... this flight is not due to start till end of July, according to the agent when i called. i don't wanna wait till end of July to go, so i guess i'll still be doing the normal route.
yikes, i really am going to so miss all the creature comforts i've become so used to since coming back here. dang..
mossies for one - so many babies and children get malaria and dengue, it's not funny. how should i be protecting val? i can't slather mossie repellent on him 24/7 or cage him under a mossie net all the time. or worse, put him on prophylaxis - no way. so? just try my best and hope that he will emerge unscathed. water --- yup, the water's not the cleanest so i just bought a water filter that promises to kill 99.99% of germs - i'm skeptical but at least it assuages my conscience. health--- the hospital isn't all that great but it's improving, so i am now buying extended health insurance for him, just so that if (cross all fingers and touch all the wood) anything happens, his hospitalisation in very expensive Darwin will be covered for. development--- i'm going to pack as many toys and books i possibly can with me so that he will at least have stuff to occupy him during times when i need to study, cook, wash clothes, etc etc etc. Yikes.... I guess it probably won't be THAT bad... i'm probably just imagining the worst. but that's better for me, you know, expect the worse, and maybe get something not so bad...
there's a new airline Austasia that's introducing a direct flight to Dili from here. that's the good news. the bad news is that it costs as much as before when i had to fly to Bali and then to Dili. i guess there's the hotel stay saved, and the indo taxes etc, and of course the hassle if u travelling with kids. BUT... this flight is not due to start till end of July, according to the agent when i called. i don't wanna wait till end of July to go, so i guess i'll still be doing the normal route.
yikes, i really am going to so miss all the creature comforts i've become so used to since coming back here. dang..
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Finally...... BLW!
Yup, finally i can experiment with BLW (baby-led weaning)! I've managed to 'brainwash' my mom to support me in this crazy experiment by showing her videos of BLW babies on YouTube.com and by how easy it is. Everyone's been egging me to start feeding Val semi-solids from the day he turned 4 months, so i've put up a Valiant struggle to fend off those spoons, although i've lost a few battles here and there. Anyways, on the day he turned 6 months, i boiled him a baby-sized carrot and he happily chomped on it, using it more as a teether than food. He was SOOOO excited it was great to just watch him go.

The next day, we were gifted a high chair from Ikea, and we reaaaally got serious with the BLW. I boiled some florets of broccoli and watched him pounce on them. He sucked on the flowers, he chewed on the stems. Ahh.... you should have heard his sounds. They were rather obscene - he sounded like a starved child. Poor baby. And yes, it was very messy. Don't do this if you're a clean freak. You will be too obsessed with picking up everything, than enjoying your baby's extreme food exploration.

Today, we went to Ikea and picked up a feeding tray that fits into the high chair as well as some Kalas BPA-free cutlery for babes. (P/s: I get all my BPA-free recommendations from zrecs.blogspot.com) Back home, We got REAL experimental. Ma steamed some psychedelic-looking sweet potatoes (they were PURPLE!!!!) with their skin on, and he really went for them. I even poked one with a nice fat baby-friendly green fork which he used pretty well. Man, his face was purple after a while, and he kept pushing all the food onto his lap so very soon he had purplish stuff and broccoli flowers all over his diapers.

Although Ma still thinks we should be feeding him brown rice gruel she can definitely see how this whole BLW thing is doing Val much good. I mean, you can see his eyes light up, and all his senses engaged as he touches the texture of his food, and learns to use his fork. It's fun too cos i eat the same food in front of him so he feels like he's eating MY food which he tried this morning at breakfast when he lunged into my pohpiah. I'm glad my ma isn't a control freak and is happy to see Val mess up his food, in fact he's been drinking from a plastic cup with one handle for a month now, just dribbling water everywhere. We think it's all part of the learning and just let him do this before a bathtime so it's easy to clean him up. You know how some people are quite freakish about 'not playing with food'... anyways, i'm just glad i'm getting some support although i do have to compromise and let Ma feed him some brown rice gruel soon. Well, can't win every battle!

Oh in case you are wondering: no, Val doesn't SWALLOW everything or else he would be the first baby on earth to eat like an adult at 6 months. No, he licks, and chomps with his gums and two little teeth, and then he spits out the chunks or hacks them out (he's quite careful and i am too! i look at him ALL the time when he's doing this). It doesn't matter how much he actually ingests cos it's about introducing him to the idea of whole foods (instead of puree), and flavour-full food without any kind of salt, sugar, or processing involved so that he will (cross my fingers!) become a very UNfussy eater who loves his veggies! The last word: I opened up a sample pack of Nestle brown rice gruel as I was actually entertaining the thought (forgive me!) of letting him try it until i tasted it and realised how incredibly sweet it was. gosh! how can baby food be so sweet! so that's it - end of the story for me and instant baby food.

The next day, we were gifted a high chair from Ikea, and we reaaaally got serious with the BLW. I boiled some florets of broccoli and watched him pounce on them. He sucked on the flowers, he chewed on the stems. Ahh.... you should have heard his sounds. They were rather obscene - he sounded like a starved child. Poor baby. And yes, it was very messy. Don't do this if you're a clean freak. You will be too obsessed with picking up everything, than enjoying your baby's extreme food exploration.

Today, we went to Ikea and picked up a feeding tray that fits into the high chair as well as some Kalas BPA-free cutlery for babes. (P/s: I get all my BPA-free recommendations from zrecs.blogspot.com) Back home, We got REAL experimental. Ma steamed some psychedelic-looking sweet potatoes (they were PURPLE!!!!) with their skin on, and he really went for them. I even poked one with a nice fat baby-friendly green fork which he used pretty well. Man, his face was purple after a while, and he kept pushing all the food onto his lap so very soon he had purplish stuff and broccoli flowers all over his diapers.

Although Ma still thinks we should be feeding him brown rice gruel she can definitely see how this whole BLW thing is doing Val much good. I mean, you can see his eyes light up, and all his senses engaged as he touches the texture of his food, and learns to use his fork. It's fun too cos i eat the same food in front of him so he feels like he's eating MY food which he tried this morning at breakfast when he lunged into my pohpiah. I'm glad my ma isn't a control freak and is happy to see Val mess up his food, in fact he's been drinking from a plastic cup with one handle for a month now, just dribbling water everywhere. We think it's all part of the learning and just let him do this before a bathtime so it's easy to clean him up. You know how some people are quite freakish about 'not playing with food'... anyways, i'm just glad i'm getting some support although i do have to compromise and let Ma feed him some brown rice gruel soon. Well, can't win every battle!

Oh in case you are wondering: no, Val doesn't SWALLOW everything or else he would be the first baby on earth to eat like an adult at 6 months. No, he licks, and chomps with his gums and two little teeth, and then he spits out the chunks or hacks them out (he's quite careful and i am too! i look at him ALL the time when he's doing this). It doesn't matter how much he actually ingests cos it's about introducing him to the idea of whole foods (instead of puree), and flavour-full food without any kind of salt, sugar, or processing involved so that he will (cross my fingers!) become a very UNfussy eater who loves his veggies! The last word: I opened up a sample pack of Nestle brown rice gruel as I was actually entertaining the thought (forgive me!) of letting him try it until i tasted it and realised how incredibly sweet it was. gosh! how can baby food be so sweet! so that's it - end of the story for me and instant baby food.
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
my hopes for Val
is that he will be free to dream,
or not to dream.
it's really easier said than done,
knowing that the relentless tide of parenting paranoia,
the inexorable guilt,
and therefore overwhelming desire "to do my best" for my kid,
lurk in the shadows
threatening to
to suck the life force out of all parents
transforming them into
dark monsters
in a deep
musty
creepy
slimey
hole
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
taking the edge off
i first noticed an 'edge' to Val's nursing late last week but was unable to see anything erupting from his gums. Yesterday for the first time, he allowed me to explore his gums more thoroughly and helpfully led me to the whereabouts of his new pearlies by biting my finger. ah-ha! Two lil teeth, just barely visible, pushing out from the pink lower gum. My poor baby. No wonder he had been waking up up in the nights, and also so restless. Luckily, instead of moaning and whining (which i hear most babies do), the happy camper releases his 'stress' by screeching in delight at an ear-piercing decibel. At least he seems happy, not sad or frustrated. The only way to quieten him is to shove him a chilled teether and he's busy gnawing away. His fave? A wet cotton cloth twisted lengthwise and frozen in the freezer. Nothing beats that icy cold numbness. Store-bought teethers just can't beat this simple apparatus.
Monday, May 26, 2008
hello avo mane
we met, we posed, we squeezed in a car, we parted without a goodbye. Val had the privilege of splattering saliva on the head of state without punishment, but he did get a napkin thrown in his direction when he refused to look at da man initially. that was funny! when did i turn into such a groupie???
Friday, May 23, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
gummy bear



We began brushing his mouth and gum from birth cos he had a suspicious-looking patch on his tongue which we thought was thrush. The habit just stuck so now everyday Val gets his gum-brush and he brushes which essentially means he sticks it into his mouth to bite and chew, occasionally choking himself, and then i finish up with a wet cloth to wipe his gums down. He's very serious about his gum-cleaning regime. Never take his brush away before he's done.
Monday, May 19, 2008
my superheroine - breastfeeding sichuan copper

CHENGDU, China - A Chinese policewoman is contributing to the country’s massive earthquake relief effort in a very personal way -- by breastfeeding eight babies. A newspaper in Chengdu, the capital of quake-hit Sichuan province, devoted a special page to the 29-year-old woman, calling her a “hero.” The woman from the quake-ravaged town of Jiangyou has just had a child herself, the Western Urban Daily said. She is nursing the children of three women who were left homeless by the quake and are too traumatised to give milk, as well as five orphans, the report said. The babies who lost their parents have been put in an orphanage which does not have powdered milk, it said. An estimated 50,000 people were killed in the May 12 earthquake, China’s worst natural disaster in a generation.
- Sapa-AFP.
**** I saw her on TV as she was tandem feeding two babies........my mom and I blubbered at the sight, and i am reminded of an article i read of how breastfeeding moms saved babies after Hurricane Katrina. By the way, the sichuan copper herself has a six-month old, whom she, IRONICALLY, has left in the care of her parents, with formula milk! Oh well..... i guess, she couldn't very well be doing everything. Oh, and contrary to the report above that says the orphanage had no powdered milk, the Chinese interviews said that the babies couldn't get used to drinking powdered milk. I do hope there will be support for the moms who are experiencing a temporary halt in milk supply - with the right help, re-lactation is possible, though very tough.
How to get a MASSAGE
Step ONE:
Blog about it
Step TWO:
delightfully receive SMS from old mate of 24 years who reads the blog, decides to get a massage and treat you to one
Step THREE:
persuade noble mother to take care of baby
Step FOUR:
bring breast pump and ice cooler box in tow
Step FIVE:
pump in changing room to wonderful aromatherapy scents, let-down achieved with no problem
Step SIX:
place 140ml of breast milk in spa's fridge so it'll keep better
Step SEVEN:
enjoy the rainforest shower like a prisoner who's not had a bath in years
Step EIGHT:
lie down to enjoy massage while hoping all that time on your chest doesn't halt milk production
Step NINE:
sigh in relief when magical spa fingers knead sore and tense muscles
Step TEN:
sigh when that steaming cup of pandan/lemon grass tea is finished and the magical day draws to an end...
Thanks YM, old mate. You're da bomb!

Oh and ya, this spa rocks......right in the middle of Bishan Park.
I say --- Heartland 1, Orchard 0
Blog about it
Step TWO:
delightfully receive SMS from old mate of 24 years who reads the blog, decides to get a massage and treat you to one
Step THREE:
persuade noble mother to take care of baby
Step FOUR:
bring breast pump and ice cooler box in tow
Step FIVE:
pump in changing room to wonderful aromatherapy scents, let-down achieved with no problem
Step SIX:
place 140ml of breast milk in spa's fridge so it'll keep better
Step SEVEN:
enjoy the rainforest shower like a prisoner who's not had a bath in years
Step EIGHT:
lie down to enjoy massage while hoping all that time on your chest doesn't halt milk production
Step NINE:
sigh in relief when magical spa fingers knead sore and tense muscles
Step TEN:
sigh when that steaming cup of pandan/lemon grass tea is finished and the magical day draws to an end...
Thanks YM, old mate. You're da bomb!
Oh and ya, this spa rocks......right in the middle of Bishan Park.
I say --- Heartland 1, Orchard 0
Sunday, May 18, 2008
ABCs of mothering
A for Val's favourite activity of arching his backB for the boobs that have milk-producing super powers
C for Val's non-stop chewing that spares nothing
D for the cloth diapers that we love
E for the engorged breasts when baby decides to sleep longer
F for the fatigue from staying up at night
G for the strong gums that sometimes chomps on the boobs
H for the hypnobirth that mama's proud of
I for the inner calm mama tries to find at times
J for the jogging mama should really be doing
K for the super speed kicks Val digs
L for his laughter whenever mommy sings
M for the massage i dream of ...
N for Val's sharp nails that always seem to need trimming
O for the olive oil we used for the cradle cap
P for the potty mama hopes Val will use ...SOON
Q for the question mama sometimes asks herself "Who am I?"
R for the raspberries that splatter saliva all over
S for the countless songs mama sings as Val plays along
T for the bath tub that Val loves to splash in these days
U for how mama feels when others are eating sushi - UNfair!
V for the orange bitter-tasting vitamins for valente, of course!
W for Val's whining when he's tired but refuses to sleep
X for the wooden xylophone mama will get - beware those plastics and toxins!
Y for the yoga contortions Val's capable of
Z for all the sleep mama really needs ---ZZZZ!
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