airport under seige

It sounds a bit dramatic but i kinda get that feeling from the reports coming in from Lusa the portuguese news agency and other sources. Apparently the gang war ranging in the airport area has become so bad that the Comoro bridge was blocked off and the airport actually shut down, and attacked by the people living in the camp nearby. The AirNorth flight was cancelled and apparently 2 international soldiers were hurt in the fray, and that real bullets (not GNR rubber ones) were flying about. One of my colleagues visited the airport in an armoured vehicle to inspect our stores there. We have our logistics base there holding hundreds and thousands of supplies for the emergency. He got there through the backroad and managed to ensure that the supplies were safe but for now, we won't be able to get those school bags to the kiddies out in the districts which is a bummer. I'm really quite disappointed with the state of affairs here. Just last week, things were still quite calm but now the #$%%^^&* are out making trouble again. And with the airport closed - it's bad bad bad PR in the world man! It's like Lebanon being attacked by Israel except our airport got attacked by angry disenfranchised locals.

It blows my mind when I think of the people destroying their own country's properties - i guess when you can't see any hope in the future, you just don't feel like you have a STAKE in the country and thus don't see a point protecting the economy or the nation. The reasons are so multi-faceted and complex it's hard to pin down a reason for this. Is it just poverty? or the culture of violence nurtured through hundreds of years of resistance and wars? or the lack of education? We're frustrated. Our Timorese friends even more so. This sense of insecurity weighs on our minds daily.

Oh lord, bless this nation.

church attacked

Yesterday while on our way to Aimutin Church in the notorious Comoro neighbourhood, as we were nearing Landmark Supermarket, we spotted people lining the streets and knew immediately there was trouble ahead. We stopped at the supermarket where some kind hearted souls had placed a whole lamp post across the road to stop vehicles from crossing, picked up a friend, and did a u-turn to try to get to church via the beach road.

We could see ahead that lots of people had gathered - presumably at the comoro market which has been a flashpoint for ethnic conflict since Day 1. We went around and actually got to church but saw lots of UNPOL and oz soldiers already gathered there. The church looked deserted and the gates were closed. Gradually more and more soldiers arrived and A took out his media pass to get closer to find out more. We then heard that the church itself was attacked in the morning right after the tetum mass was over. People had came into the compound and attacked the church goers as they were exiting. but news that the church was destroyed was wrong because i checked out and there wasn;t any broken glass. EVentually at about 1130 (one hour late) the priest began mass with about 30 of us. We were small but our voices were strong and it gave me great satisfaction that Mass was celebrated despite the destructive efforts of some. it was a memorable mass knowing that outside the gates, a ethnic storm was brewing.

At this point in time, i had no idea what happened to cause the attacks but according to news reports, 2 easterner boys were killed, beheaded and their limbs cut off by westerners - the grisly deaths inciting revenge attacks. Sigh. It's awful. Last night too, the timorese family i live with received news that one of their relatives in railaku was murdered. i don't know whether it has been confirmed or was it just rumours. but i know when it hits you that close, it's hard to stay level-headed and 'calm' and allow justice to take its course. easier said than done.

where to get the report

Thanks to John from ETAN - here's the link for the Independent Commission's Inquiry on what happened here in Timor. It's also available in Portuguese, Bahasa Indonesia, and of course Tetum. On my way in today, i saw a cleaning lady reading a document, with her brows furrowed in concentration. Hours later, i walked past her again and this time she was surrounded by at least 4 others who were keenly listening to her as she read out word by word the report in Tetum. I would say she's about halfway through - probably past the juicy stuff and into the more technical boring literature.

I myself felt that the report gave a lot of insight into what was actually happening on those days 28th APril, 23rd May - 25th May because we ourselves being here and with bad communications and unreliable media and no reliable source of information at that time were not completely aware of the battles being raged up the hills, or even in Tibar or Comoro. Dili is small but not that small. A lot of stuff happening in those corners you wouldn't hear unless you actually ventured out. At least now I know what was all that boom boom boom going on in Becora on 24th and 25th May exactly was about. And the report also clearly stated the ambiguities of loyalties for the Police and Army - we can't anymore say for sure (as before)that the police is pro-alkatiri and army pro-xanana anymore really. the subtleties are really intriguing and insightful. It also broke my heart to think that one of our timorese police friend who was shot was actually called back to the police hq that morning of 25th almost deliberately into the line of fire!

ETAN (East Timor & Indonesia Action Network) has also posted a response at this link I haven't read it as yet so i won't say anything except that I'm not from ETAN and linking this does not represent my personal views! ;-)

Calm for now

For now that is. Last night we all sped home bracing ourselves for some violence but like what the UNPOL chief said everyone's probably reading the report for its final details and has yet to react or mobilise a group reaction to the report. Me too. I have only just read the summary page which names some names like Rogerio Lobato, Mari Alkatiri, Paulo Martins, Xanana, Roque Rodrigues, Tau Matan Ruak. No surprises really but everyone's waiting too for a judiciary response from the government as a test of its political will. The President has also appealed once again for political parties not to use this to create more trouble. You can get your hands on the report for 79 pages of reading at the UNHCR website. Sorry i don't have the link now but will update this blog once i do. It's quite a pain to hunt for it!

Rabbits & Chickens

so everyone's waiting for D-DAY when the results of the independent commission's inquiry will be released. Apparently the delay in the release has been due to the commission's decision to translate the findings in 4 languages - Portuguese, English, Indonesian and Tetum. A really good idea i must say because publishing it in Portuguese would probably mean 5% of the population will understand anything! An interesting report by the International Crisis Group has been published - so if you want the lowdown on the Timor crisis - click on this link : Resolving Timor-Leste's crisis. You will find some interesting references to rearing rabbits and chickens, soap and handwashing (without particular concern to hygiene!), and monkeys.

ain't a burning plastic bag

This ain't so flamin' plastic bag! it's a "kong ming deng" or Kong Ming Lantern which is kinda like a hot air balloon. (And my blog entry is resembling its haphazard flight path cos of my tech illiteracy!)
I've always been fascinated by how it works and finally one day, SM brings one home and showed me how it works.


it's real simple. Just make a light weight lantern out of plastic, make a ring at the bottom, with a very light candle and wick - light the candle and let the hot air fill up the plastic bag and then give a light push.
once the hot air balloon catches a slight wind, off it goes flying to the moon! It was a pretty sight and at least one nice evening to cheer us all up! Hurray to Kong Ming who must have invented this lantern if not why is it named after him? Anyone knows?

Foamed

Okay the foam was delivered to Bali 3 days after I arrived and then was sent up to UBUD where I had a most wonderful few days staring out into green ricefields... ahhh... the life.... It was quite surreal plonking down with my luggage and sitting at the verandah of the guesthouse and enjoying the sight of green stalks of rice swaying in the gentle breeze...the cliche however didn't last too long and soon I was back on the plane and back to ET.

Sometimes it's more cruel to take a break as it leaves me wanting more...in fact, i am still experiencing a bit of the returning blues -- from being able to lounge in a cool restaurant, and walking the streets of Ubud at night alone, to having WIFI --- to being back in 'house arrest' or sorts every night here in ET. I know there are people who still go out for dinner etc but hey these are people with cars and big brave hearts. I only have my 2 'kars' or legs (in Hokkien!) and i have courage of a mouse!

It's also getting a little discouraging to hear news of killings and fighting every single day. I can sense the morale really creeping far south for my Timorese friends. Just 2 days ago, someone was knifed to death outside the Fitun Maubara supermarket in Colmera. That afternoon i passed by and there was a pool of blood outside the supermart -lying next to it was a stack of styroam boxes -the victim's shopping.

But we have to keep our chins up! LUTA HAMUTUK (struggle on!). Well, at least the magazine i'm working on is looking rather good thanks to our 1st class designer. I'm turning 31 too.........gosh.... time flies....i hope my birthday won't be too 'bloody' cos we're expecting big trouble when the Independent Commission of Inquiry is announced next week.

lost and FOAM

i was going to upload some nice futuristic looking pictures of the new Thailand airport suvarnbhumi or something like that .... except that the people there LOST MY POLYFOAM!!! argggh...... if you read my previous entry, i had gone ALL the way to bangkok to buy polyfoam (ok it was for the workshop but still!) and then after spending time and money buying it and hauling it around with me in Bangkok...... the PEOPLE there lose it.... argghh... i think by the end of the month, the new airport will have enough "LOST" ( and never found) items to fill an entire warehouse...
the irony was that while on the nice plane to Bali i had been thinking "hmm what should i do with the polyfoam while in bali? store in at the airport until i leave or what?" well, my stooopid question was answered unfortunately with the foam lost in transit somewhere. maybe it's on its way to Dubai??? or London? Sigh. so it looks like i might have to buy some foam here in indonesia instead.
Bleh.....

tumbled into Bangkok

wah... i m like a jungle bunny here in bustling Bangkokkkkk! it's scary actually. this morning i took a walk out from my (terribly overrated and horribly ugly and expensive) hotel BANGKOK CITY INN (don't go there!) randomly towards the main shopping stretch and even at 8am, people were jostling in the narrow sidewalks buying fake goods! can't believe the spirit of entreprise and the great consumerism here. i forget what it's like in singapore - except in singapore we really don't have people buying fake Pradas at 8am. the streets were also packed with itinerant hawkers selling all sorts of unhealthy deep fried stuff that i could only watch but cannot taste cos i'm still recovering from a sore throat from last week's vitriol-induced illness. i finally got onto the light rail and headed towards the central pier and hopped onto a a VERY slow boat to Phra Athit Road where UNICEF's regional and thai office is strategically located along the Chao Praya river. I got there, met a thai colleague who brought me shopping for POLYFOAM CORE (yes... we don't even have these in timor) but K did remind me that it's a good thing too cos the foam core is really unenvironmentally friendly.
after a brief shower (rain i mean!) and a very light lunch, i went to shop! or i thought i would. what did i pick up? hmm... pills for my incessant phelgm and chesty cough. bleh... everything looked so expensive and glossy and loud. I really forget what sleepy timor does to one. now i understand why when i once brought my parents out for a movie back in singapore, they asked me why the sound was so loud and i laughed! now i have a buzz in my ears from all the traffic noise blended with arcade effects, and promotional ads that run nonstop in these malls.
all afternoon i wanedered aimlessly in the malls, searching for a fine pair of leather sandals that would suit my feet - something low and yet classy. nope couldn't find a pair that was like that OR everything was too big! i was even prepared to splurge on a pair of Clarks if there was a good pair. oh well. too bad.
i really have not walked so much in a long while - i have forgotten what atheleticism in a city is. luckily i wore my comfy sandals - also no nonsense but already looking rather well worn. it's refreshing to get out of dili once in a while - reminds you of how reality for different people can really b extremely unsimilar. while i am glad to have a break out of dili and from hearing depressing reports everyday of fights, stone throwing and stabbings, i kinda miss the ocean waves that pound ceaselessly as i fall asleep to its rhythms. one day away, and i already miss Timor - yikes - have i really become a jungle bunny????

Busy B

How long has it been since I had the luxury of time to open up the blogger page? Loooong. So looong i nearly forgot the password to my site! and last night, i had a dream that people left comments on my blog that they're longer visiting my site cos it doesn't have anymore Timor updates. Yikes! I wrung my hands in despair in my dream and vowed to wake up to do something concrete. So here i am - 9am on a saturday morning - in the office typing away, listening to Stephanie Sun croon away.
The truth is, i've been wanting to say a lot - my mind has been racing with thoughts except i never had the time these days to put them all down - sooo busy sometimes i do0n't even log onto the internet the entire day and then it's 6pm time to go home before it gets dark. SO i leave home with thoughts boiling over in my little brain and with no outlet - no wonder i fell horribly sick last 3 days - must have been the excessive vitriol i haven't been able to expunge via the blog.

OKay - first updates on Timor. Since the farcical escape of Alfredo from jail, this country's journalism has slipped many bars downwards. So bad the press is these days, i fear to see what the next headline might be every day the papers are sent in to the office. I hope Jeremy Wagstaff reads this blog cos months ago he asked what the Timorese reporters felt about the whole civil unrest. The fact is that many of them have become LAZY or unethical. choose whichever one suits you. Many of their reports have been lop-sided - going as far as to quote one person, or one party entirely who sling accusations at another and never so much as get a comment from the acccused. It's terrible!

FOR EXAMPLE - Mass for Alfredo. I gawped the day the AUstralian press went on about how the FNJP was organising a mass for Alfredo. I quickly scanned the papers and discovered that there was indeed an ad about a mass for Alfredo in Gleno, Ermera district. It was to 'give courage and power to Alfredo to speak the truth.' I quickly asked a colleague and he checked with the parish priest in Ermera who said, 'it is just propaganda. the mass is for those who died in the unrest.' so obviously the church had been hijacked for political purpose here. I feared that the Timorese who largely see the church as authoritative would then think that the church was behind Alfredo and thus he is RIGHT. How scary. So why was it that we could easily check with the priest in question but the newspapers couldn't? 2 days later, there was a new ad, this time it was "for those who died in the unrest of Arpril 28 and May 25th and to give courage to those who seek the truth.' AHh..... much better. But still, i wonder how much damage has been done?

Another disturbing thought these days ------------- that many Timorese actually think that Alfredo is not a criminal! their sense of justice is quite different from ours (meaning the west? i dunno!) but perhaps because of their guerilla resistance past, the sense of right and wrong is not aligned with conventional legality. Ok, for example, Alfredo went AWOL with his men up to Maubisse. Instead of being chastised, he was endorsed by Xanana for doing the right thing. IN at least my country, a military commander who takes men away with weapons would be in real hot soup. But ok, considering the great chaos then, let's cut him some slack. And then, on May 24th in Fatuahi, Alfredo fires upon a bunch of soldiers who had come into Dili to collect their pay. He was caught on film counting down and firing on them and possibly killing one. AGain, this doesn't seem to have taken any brownie points from him. And then when he came back to Dili and surrendered weapons, the international forces found 9 more unsurrendered weapons and threw him into Jail. Wait, and then he walks out of jail in an elaborately planned scheme and tells the world that he is not a criminal. Guess what, many highly educated Timorese agree with him! They say, he left because after 30 days in jail no action had been taken and that he had been threatened in jail.

i agree that the justice system here sucks - which is why gangsterism has flowered to take justice in their own hands - and why men like Alfredo are revered. So far, even though Alfredo and many others have critised the incumbent but have not submitted any real concrete action plan. ironically, when Mari Alkatiri was in power, Jose Ramos-Horta said that he himself was more suitable. Now, Alfredo says Ramos-horta is no different from Mari and that he Alfredo can do a better job. Oh dear. Sounds like a broken record.

i ask my Timorese friends, so what is it that they want as a nation? More violence? They must stand up to DENY violence if they want this nation to thrive. UNfortunately, this small half island has been taken hostage by all different interests and of course its predators have jumped in to take advantage of the rocky situation.

TIMOR TIMOR! Were the lessons of 1975 not hard enough?

Phew, all that vitriol spent. more to come soon. now gotta get back to work. TA

4 september

Last Monday, when I went back to Becora, I was greeted by seemingly endless rows of candles on both sides of the road. Their flames flickered brightly ing in the pitch darkness as the electricity was off - creating a beautiful ghostly scene. Children were lighting up candles and gathered outside their homes chatting - we almost forgot that we were still in a 'crisis'. Somehow Becora has emerged to be one of the safest neighbourhoods in recent months. The candles were lit to remember the many who were massacred on 4 September 1999 by the militia when Timorese voted to have their own independence, after 24 years of Indonesia rule foisted upon them. Apologies for the bad photo but I ain't got a fancy camera or a tripod! Anyways, it's poignant to think that now, the nation has once again plunged into dark times. Yeah, these days, it's a little more stressful working when at the back of your mind, you're wondering when the next trouble spot would be. This afternoon, i was at Alola Foundation interviewing the First Lady when 2 youth gangs (yup of course loro sae versus monu) began stoning each other just on the road outside. Apparently this has been happening everyday. The international forces say they need hard evidence to capture anyone but with ROCKS come on who are we kidding??? The police told Alola staff that witnesses were not enough so they'll have to snap a few photos of the troublemakers themselves before any real action can take place. Oh well..... anyways, i better get going. These days, it ain't safe on the streets after dark.

fatuk

here's the blistering bugger that's been creating so much chaos these days in Dili. yeah, that's it - you looking at it - that FATUK - available in infinite numbers and unclassifiable as a weapon - yet if anyone has ever been hit by one, he or she'll attest to its sheer strength to draw blood. These days you gotta be careful - malae (foreigner) not excluded - some terribly bored and energetic boys have been lining streets hurling stones at passing cars - so these days it's not uncommon to see cars with shattered windscreens - it's too expensive to replace! In fact, it was only when a friend stepped on the accelerator that she narrowly missed her car becoming a statistic. The other day, we had to call the police after seeing a row of boys outside the Australian compound randomly attacking cars. Geezzz... what do you do with these kids? You can take away slingshots or katana but how can you take away FATUK????

On a lighter note, today someone wrote an email with the headline "XXX bitten 2 year old child..." I was of course lured to read the email first amongst the 25 waiting for my attention. It was fascinating reading about how XXX bit the 2 year old while XXX was trying to arrest the toddler's father. I was shocked - walked over to a colleague who had received the same mail and said, "did you read that???" Minutes later this colleague walks by my desk and said, "it's BEATEN not bitten." ???? Oh ya? I re-read the email and gathered finally that it was meant to be BEATEN but the person sending the email had wrote as BITTEN mistaking it to be the right word. How hilarious! It was funny cos that would be like a man bite dog headline story. But now after laughing about it, i'm thinking of the actual "XXX BEATEN 2 year old" - shucks such violence taking place here. If it's really true, something really needs to be done. As you may have gathered the XXX refers to an international force here - a highly frustrated international force which has been encountering so much difficulties with law enforcement here. The youth gangs simply playing cat and mouse with the beefy guys - scattering in seconds into their warrens when the coppers come. Interestingly, a Timorese frined told me that Becora where i used to live has become very safe now because a local gang leader (i can't mention his name!) has told all the young people to stay out of trouble or else... (what else??? but his fist!) so ironically in the face of greater violence, the youth in Becora are actually toeing the line and the area is now pretty quiet compared to the rest like Comoro and Colmera. So maybe the government needs to recruit these gang leaders? Strange huh?


Finally, as a goodbye - i treat you to these super yummy lobsters which my ema-bot (or big boss) bought when we were on our way to lunch on Saturday. 3 lobsters for USD30. Absolute HEAVEN. Slurp. Burp.

tumbleweeed thinks...

There has been a renewed rash of violence in the past week with stonings and fires. I have even heard that a Malae who stays with Timorese from both East and West had their rented house set on fire and all their belongings stolen. a group of IDPs in the Jardim (opposite Hotel Timor) have become very unwelcomed guests in the Colmera sucu so much so that the Xefe de Sucu has even annoucned that he wants them to go - this is because there have been quite a bit of stones being hurled from that camp and even broken windows of cars passing through that area. Some young people in Bairro Pite have even carried big placards saying that they don't want to accept any Easterners.

So what should be done?

It's strange that i should be saying this - but i think what the government needs is a great mouthpiece to spread its propaganda - or in a less biased way - spread INFORMATION. There's a lack of accurate information dissemination in this country - lots of people rely on LIA ANIN ("windy words") or GOSSIP - and statements repeated through a chain of whispers until they become distorted and incendiary in some cases.

So if there's one thing this government should learn - is to look to its neighbours to see how they have so carefully crafted their own information ministries and built up government newspapers, radio and tv stations to spread THEIR news. Why am i saying this? Because i believe this government is trying its best but too few people know exactly what it's doing.

Take for example, on 2 august President Xanana held a meeting with 18 NGOs to discuss how they could get young people from East and West to assist in reintegrating IDPs and creating dialogue for peace building -----GREAT INITIATIVE but what the government needs is a strategy to communicate all this to the folks at large - remember most don't have a TV or even a radio set - besides the fact that most of Timor is without electricity! So besides engaging the media - there must be other channels for communicating news, information and generating feedback.

GOOD WORK needs to be trumpeted ---- so there's a pressing need for communicators and social mobilisers to get involved! Here's one time when i accept that propaganda is fully needed!

OH by the way, this is an APOLITICAL weblog. Someone posted a statement in Tetum on my comments page asking me to translate it into English. MY tetum ain't great but i could figure out what it was roughly. SOrry to say, i've deleted it cos i don't want my blog hijacked by others to spread THEIR propaganda. If you want to let the world see your thoughts, set up your own blog! ;-)

brrrr and grrinnnnn

this little girl was amongst many bathing in a big hole in a road in Baucau.. it was so cold!

i'm so shyyy
Originally uploaded by tumbleweeed.

apparently someone had placed big rocks in the river upriver so as to create a greater flow of water downhill.... and someone dug up a HOLE in the road where the water has spilled - creating a SWIMMING POOL in the middle of a road ... see this picture!

baucau tomatoes

been so busy i haven't had anytime to blog or much energy to think! Went to Baucau in a day and back! Arggh... my butt still hurts from the 2.5 hours journey there and 2.5hrs back! Monday i go to Baucau again - this time with Indra my colleagues, for a 2 day session with our community volunteers to envision the setting up of Adolescents information centres out in districts. How exciting! For now, just wanted to share this juicy picture and by the way, i bought that stack of tomatoes with the small bright red one at the top! HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND!

through the eyes of the children

a sample of some drawings by children when we asked them to paint what they think of Timor-Leste generally. A picture speaks a thousand words, huh?

Her World....

Blogger Afny left a long comment on my previous blog entry after she read about my blog in the latest Her World magazine. Frankly, I'm surprised that the Her World interview that i agreed to in June has actually reached at least ONE Singaporean reader. So thank you HERWORLD! I had agreed to be interviewed because I had hoped that this mainstream women's magazine might give me some subterfuge (amidst the endless pages of glossy adverts!) so that i could spring upon unsuspecting readers with my 'covert' views.

I had hoped that more Singaporeans especially women would stop thinking "if only i could....." or "I wish i could...." and instead tell themselves "I will!". Too many days and months and years have been wasted from thinking of "should i? would i? could i?" and too little time spent on DOING IT.

Of course when i first agreed to be interviewed, i did not realise i also had to endure a lengthy photo shoot - with makeup to boot! Initially they put on this slinky, black branded top on me and a chunky gold necklace that weighed my neck down, and asked me to pose against a gritty wall looking 'cool'. haha, i think after a while, they realised that it's just NOT me! So they gave up and told me to wear casual singlets instead and my own jeans.

One thing to clarify though. I am NO LONGER a volunteer with UNICEF, instead working as a communication consultant - basically doing the same work (and more) and with greater responsibilities. Many organisations now would rather not have international volunteers here as the perceived risks are still there. At least as a contracted staff you get evacuated should anything happen again.

Okay maka ne'e deit (that's all) from me today on a sunny sunday. back to work! Yup........

gone with the wind

autumn in dili?
Originally uploaded by tumbleweeed.

this is how many parts of dili looks - scorched, brittle, brown, dead, razed. of course, new life springs forth quickly from the dust - it's how nature is - how humans are. yet ... there is some sadness ... especially when a colleague returns to his razed home for the first time to see his house - and returns with only a handful of photo negatives and a colour photo of his daughter. that's all he has now, after having spent five years of his life reconstructing his grandmother's house (which had been razed to the ground post 99 by militia) and now, that's gone too. In 1999, his many books were burnt, now in 2006, the same again. how can one not feel hopeless? how do the many timorese affected by this violence feel about the future? do they even dare to think of what next year might be like? i'm sure many would hesitate to invest in any material possessions - unlike so many of us in comfy, safe singapore where our lifestyle is about accumulating wealth, properties, material goods. the timorese have no choice but to focus on what's most important - that the lives of their loves ones were not lost. that's how basic living is like here. you don't ask for more.

metinaro camp

locally-designed kitchens

Following the troubles in Dili, thousands of IDPs fled from the city out to the districts and one of the places they have congregated in is opposite the F-FDTL training camp in Metinaro. There're about 7000 IDPs living in a huge piece of land, and like in Dili, the area is now dotted with hundreds of white UNHCR tents. But because you can't cook inside the tents, the IDPs have taken to using local materials to build their 'dapur' or kitchen with palm fronds and sticks.

Paper toilet
filing cabinet

Bathrooms constructed out of whatever materials the IDPs could find... the one above is made out of used UNHCR boxes, while the more sophisticated maroon-coloured bathroom is actually made out of FILES! Yes, i dunno where they got them, but someone made sure that they were all of the same colour! And why are they not using the copious amounts of tarpaulin distributed by aid agencies? Apparently - according to a source - some supplies had gone missing under the management of a previous team of volunteers who are IDPs at the camp. Since then they have been replaced with a new team of volunteers whom i saw putting up tents (donated by PLAN intl) for the doctors who visit everyday.

At the camp, i met a young man called Santiago. he spoke good english and was a university student at the UNTL until the crisis. He lived in Becora - where my place was! - and had fled to Metinaro after he was attacked three times. It was really sad hearing him speak of how his neighbours and friends whom he had grown up with attacked him during the height of the emergency - he is so confused - like so many others - he doesn't know why he was attacked and who manipulated others to turn on their friends and neighbours - he wants to come back to Dili but is fearful. He told me that he still believes it's not an ethnic clash but a political struggle gone awry. He said there are 'westerners' too living in the Metinaro camp but nobody harms them or targets them...

this is what Timor now needs to look at - peacebuilding. How to restore respect for one another? since returning, i read Kirsty Sword's "A Woman of Independence" and was saddened by how everything she and Xanana had wished then was not to be now. She had quoted Xanana as saying that once Timor was independent, there would be no more violence and bloodshed in this country. I am now reading John Taylor's book on Timor's history too - and again, during the struggle for independence, the resistance fighters had stressed that violence would end only with independence and on the contrary, the Indons had said that an indie east Timor would be a destabilising force and might spiral into civil unrest. HOW IRONIC is this? and how sad....

slowly slowly

let peace come to Timor!
Originally uploaded by tumbleweeed.

I have heard that the Art Group Arte Moris is the 'culprit' behind a rash of graffiti in town ---- so i took a walk along the beach yesterday and saw that indeed, someone, or somebodies have indeed painted the town 'red' blue green, yellow - whatever colours in order to restore some colour, gaiety, and positive energies back into this town now crowded with displaced people. This used to be a dull blue hoarding for a piece of land undergoing construction, now loud, graffiti-styled words in Tetum calling for PEACE, LOVE, STABILITY, and ONE TIMOR shout out from it. This is just next to FreeFlow the dive shop and very hard to miss. Arte Moris (i am presuming)has also put up cheerful banners on some other streets to remind people to BRING PEACE (Lori Paz) and generally remember that Timor must be one.

While walking along the pantai kelapa, i also noticed many more families out on the beach eating ikan bakar, ayam potong and of course batar nurak (soft grilled corn). Hmmm.... the food here is so delicious - especially when freshly done - the chicken meat so juicy, the ikan so crispy, the batar yummy! But if you're used to a life of 'sterilised' food, don't even look at how it's prepared --- but i hear that ASH is pretty sterile hahaha. Yes, that's how they cook your corn - they place it standing up on the ash.
I also couldn't resist a photo of this cutest boy playing in the water with his mom looking on at him from the shore. It's nice to see such scenes once again in Dili. So, LIFE is getting back to normal - more traffic on the streets - more people out in the sea at low tide picking up morsels of yummy seafood - but for now, the camps remain full of people at nights - still preferring to err on the side of caution. How long will these camps be here? Only GOD knows.

rosaries for peace

Photo by Armando Lay.

Last Saturday, I passed some 200 rosaries made by OUR LADY'S ROSARY MAKERS - a group of Singaporeans who handmake rosaries - to the Saint Bachita Orphanage (picture) and the Salesian Sisters in Comoro who are running an IDP camp right now. They were really glad to receive them and were surprised that they had been handmade by Singaporeans! Salesian Sister Lubelia said they pray every evening and the rosaries would be great gifts to uplift their worn spirits. Thanks to the generous friends in Singapore who made these gifts! The children at the orphanage prayed for the wellbeing of the Singaporeans who thought of them during this time. Prayer heals!

Saving lives with Nutritional Screening

By Bridgette See

Dili, 1 July 2006 - As little Nevia Nunes huddled close to her mother’s breast, her eyes were half-open, her face a picture of exhaustion. The 15-month-old had cried for a long time before succumbing to fatigue. Nevia was one of the three severely malnourished toddlers identified at the Don Bosco IDP camp today.

PHoto by Armando Lay

“She was able to walk and stand on her own before the crisis. But since coming here, her condition has worsened,” said her mother Maria Santina da Conceicao. The 28 year old mother of three was also malnourished during her pregnancy, a likely reason why Nevia was more vulnerable.

The family fled to the Don Bosco school when troubles began in late April. Staying at the shelter for two months has taken its toll on Nevia. Her family sustains her mainly on porridge and sometimes vegetables when they can afford it. She is also living in an overcrowded camp where an estimated 14,000 people have been displaced from their homes. Despite the best efforts of camp coordinators and humanitarian aid workers to keep the camp clean, children are still most susceptible to infections and diseases. As a result, coughs, malaria, and acute diarrhea are amongst the most common illnesses spreading through the camps now.

“She sleeps with the rest of us on the floor here,” said Maria Conceicao. “At night, when the wind blows, it’s cold. And even though we have a mosquito net, she still gets bitten.” Nevia’s mother pointed out their mats which were laid out on a corridor, next to a drain and sheltered by a piece of tarpaulin.

Little Nevia is now severely underweight and suffering from acute diarrhea. This prompted the doctors to send her to the Dili National Hospital for treatment immediately.

This is what the Health ministry and humanitarian aid workers fear would happen to more children as Timor-Leste enters its third month of emergency. Before the crisis, Timor-Leste was already the most undernourished country in the Asia-Pacific region. Around 50 per cent of children below 5 years old are underweight, with 14 per cent severely underweight and 48 per cent stunted.

In response, the Health Ministry, supported by UNICEF and other NGOs , launched a Nutritional Screening on Friday 30 June 2006 in order to identify children who are malnourished and intervene before their health further deteriorates. The campaign’s target are the estimated 10,000 children aged 6 months to under 5 who are living in the 66 camps in Dili.

The assessment team saw 70 children at the first camp yesterday and another 300 at Dom Bosco today. They used a simple strip to measure the mid-upper arm circumference of the children to check their nutritional status. Those who appear to be malnourished had their weight and height taken as confirmation. Those whose weight for height percentage fell below 85% were referred to the doctors from the Health Ministry for further checks.

More than 40 out of the 300 were referred to the doctors, and five sent to hospital for further treatment. Lukas Sarmento is another child who will be given therapeutic milk to increase his weight. The 2year, 8 months old boy has been sickly since birth.

Photo by Armando Lay

"A doctor told me Lukas had very low chances of survival when he was born but we've never given up hope on him," said his father Carlos Sarmento. Although clearly underweight, Lukas remains bright and cheerful, playing peek-a-boo with the reporter while his father was being interviewed. He is still able to run and has a healthy appetite.

It is not an entirely gloomy picture in the two camps visited. Many children were healthy and had bright alert eyes. Their mothers continue to breastfeed and there is no food shortage at the moment. The Ministry of Labour and Community Re-Insertion and the World Food Programme have distributed enough rations for everyone at the camps – from rice, corn-soy blend, oil to sugar. WFP said it has held cooking demonstrations to show parents how to make use of the fortified corn-soy blend.

The nutritional screening by the Health Ministry, UNICEF, and its NGO partners could save lives but it is not without challenges.

“There is an urgency to identify the severe cases quickly, yet at the same time we are faced with the dilemma of whether we can assure them the quality treatment,” said Jennifer Barak UNICEF Project Officer for Child Survival and Maternal Health Care.

The reason is that only 60% of the National Hospital staff has returned to work, and the hospital grounds have turned into an IDP camp. Severely malnourished children should be isolated so that they will not be exposed to infections while being treated.

Dirce Maria Soares, who is the Nutrition Officer from the Health Ministry, said: "We have asked our colleagues at the hospital to prepare for this but they are now coping with limited staff, limited equipment and overcrowding. Perhaps when more IDP camps are built, those staying in the hospital grounds will move away, giving more space for the families of malnourished children to move in and accompany them.”

For now, the best solution has been that only the severe malnourished children with complications are sent to the hospital while the rest are treated by doctors based at all the IDP camps. The Health Ministry together with UNICEF and its partners are exploring the possibility of treating those who are severely malnourished but have no other complications at the camps with ready-to-use therapeutic foods or upgrading community health centers and their staff into day-time feeding facilities.


* NGO Working Group: Hiam Health, WorldVision, Oxfam, Care, Concern, Health Alliance International, Christian Children’s Fund, UNICEF

life is gradually becoming normal

the first few mikrolets i saw on the streets since the day I returned to Dili! I never thought i would feel so much joy seeing these micro-mini buses hog the roads! But yes, this would be one of the barometers indicating a gradual shift back to normality although last night there was still at least one incident of house burning and stone throwing.

most of the IDP camps are stressed by the overwhelming number of people living in it so the toilets etc are either out of water or broken or not enough. when i visited the Motael camp, the women told me they bathe at the well in their clothes because it is too tiring for them to haul water to the bathroom to shower. So they bath their kids there like in the kampong except that this is in the city! Some of the camps are right smack in the city centre - one in front of Hotel Timor! - so they really lack privacy.

- Hanging out washing at the airport IDP camp.

Photo by Armando Lay.

This boy here is Lukas - he's not shy, but was playing peek a boo with me when i interviewed his father yesterday at the Dom Bosco camp. He was one of the three children identified as severely malnourished and needed to be sent to the hospital for treatment.You know how they say, every cloud has a silver lining? I think that if not for this emergency and them being at the camp, Lukas may not have been identified as malnourished and put on treatment until it's too late. Lukas was very bright despite clearly underweight. Thankfully there were many other children who were healthy, very bright clever eyes. 'Matenek los!' i have to say.

I went to the Canossian sister's IDP camp on Friday and met a girl who was in the English mass choir. She came and hugged me. She had lost so much weight but still had a smile on her face...

Photo by Armando Lay.

Clothes of some staff living in our compound, some of their homes have been destroyed by gangs, while others do not dare to return home as their other relatives have fled to the districts.

Will blog more when i have the time! Don't forget Timor!

Peaceful ---- so far

There was great tension today as Dili residents fearfully awaited for the 200 truckloads of demonstrators from the eastern districts to arrive. These protestors or so-called 'Alkatiri supporters' had been held off at Hera and Metinaro for nearly two days by the foreign troops so as to prevent a face-off with the westerners who had hung around from last Friday till yesterday. Apparently, Xanana appealed to the westerners to leave. This afternoon, the demonstrators were escorted into the city by the foreign troops promising to be peaceful. Not wanting any trouble, the troops had searched them one by one to make sure that weapons were confiscated before allowing anyone into Dili. This took a long time and it was only at 4pm did we see the protestors ride by outside the office, raising the brilliantly beautiful Timorese flag and shouting their slogans.

STRANGELY, for people who were supposedly calling for Xanana's exit (as we had heard), they were shouting 'Viva Xanana! Viva ALkatiri!' all in one breath! They certainly behaved rather differently from the guys I saw a few days ago who had trundled down Becora - led by a noisy motorbike rally, and many honking vehicles, shouting, screaming youth (including women) some painted in white, red and other colours. In contrast, these guys here (as far as my few minutes' of seeing them rumble by) were a lot more subdued. The trucks, it seemed, were not as packed. The guys less energetic. So far, there's been no news of violence from them. They'll be parked near the port tonight - presumably under heavy guard just to ensure there'll be no trouble.

Let's see what tomorrow or tonight will bring.

censorship - how much of an evil is it?

Back in Dili now, I initially rejoiced because the day I started work Mari Alkatiri resigned from his post ---- and people were happy. But then yesterday, troubles began again after he met his supporters in Hera (east of Dili city) and made more incendiary remarks about east versus west. The foreign troops are trying to keep the big groups of protestors apart, and keeping the easterners out of the city parked in Hera.

But right after Mari's remarks on TV, like 5 minutes after, the stoning and burning began again. Once again, the westerners in Dili are targetting their eastern neighbours.

I keep hearing news from outside. Like the handful of journalists from RTTL attacked this morning as people think they are Mari supporters for putting out the news. It makes me wonder if sometimes censorship to some extent is necessary. Instead of broadcasting his speech in his entirety, could they not have paraphrased what he said and perhaps lessen its inflammatory impact? It doesn't help that the politicians here shoot themselves in the foot all the time with their words, and now there's also the media simply publishes everything under the sky.

When do we draw the line how much 'news' we report?

hein hela

i'm twiddling my thumbs here at home, waiting for news that i can return to timor. anytime now they say. but then sometimes, they call and say, no don't come, something's brewing. other days, when peace seems to hang briefly, the outlook is more positive... but generally it seems that those i speak to know that this peace that is suspended over most parts of Dili is an artificial one, hanging on the threads that are the international troops. So while i wait, all i can do is to help to edit the occasional story or press release. But it's hard to stay involved when you're so far away.
I've heard that an ultimatum has been issued to Alkatiri to resign, as well as one to Alfredo to return with his arms. I can't seem to corroborate this with the commercial media so that puzzles me. Anyways, seems like the ultimatum for both A-lpha males to say 'i quit' lands squarely on the same day and thus many people are readying themselves again for a showdown of some sort. Dili might get 'HOT' or manas again. Once again, may i stress that my blog is not a news service and that should anyone have more accurate info, please let me know!

peace march on international children's day

My aunt once said the world would never find peace until men fell at their women's feet and asked for forgiveness.
Jack Kerouac

I posted the famous Beat poet's quote in my blog last October and have now found occasion to repost it again after hearing that there are plans to have a PEACE MARCH in Dili led by a women's network TOMORROW. I learnt this just today from a colleague who is planning to join in to show support. That is the best piece of news yet coming out of Dili which has been subject to gun battles and marauding rival gangs. I really hope that this peace march gets news coverage and that it is successfully and peacefully carried out. Apparently the organisers are motivating women from camps to join in the march - but some are fearful because of their children and also due to the trauma.

I've read before reports that say if women were rulers of nation, there would be less war and less corruption. What those reports were based upon, I'm not sure but I sure know that the Timorese who were wielding guns and machetes were mostly men. Ok, to be fair, I do have a friend who was a former guerilla fighter and she's a woman, and yes, we have heard alot about the female guerilla/ resistance fighters in the Vietnam War, the Khmer Rouge and of course the Timorese resistance. But most times, you have to admit this, it is the MEN who form the majority of the fighting. As for corruption, I can't say but some detractors say it's only because women have not been in positions of authority where they milk bribes. Anyways, what i have seen is that even when families can't afford to send children to school, husbands still clutch handfuls of dollar notes to gamble in the local markets in Timor. Hey, i'm not a man hater but it really just makes me wonder what IF the government had 90% women and 10% men - would it make a big difference? Which country is ready for this experiment?

So what do you think? If all the men in Timor now fell at the feet of their wives, and ask for forgiveness, would peace finally reign in Timor?

Significantly but very sadly JUNE 1 (which is tomorrow) is the International Children's Day - a day that we had been planning in earnest with the Government's Human Right Office and various other partners. My colleagues had begun meeting sometime in March to discuss plans for a national celebration, a poetry contest etc etc etc. A day that was supposed to be filled with happy faces, rousing music, beautiful sweet voices and HOPE. That all just evaporated with the first gun shot.

I'm really glad that some energetic women have still got the courage to put together the peace march, and perhaps that might remind these warring factions to put down their weapons and to consider their children and their future.


VIVA TIMOR LORO'SAE!

where're the timorese reporters?

I read the columnist Jeremy Wagstaff's comment about the dearth of timorese reporting (online) on this ongoing chaos and responded with the comment that a lot of the local reporters i know of are actually assisting foreign reporters at this moment - translating and bringing them to places.

In fact, last Saturday at the airport, I saw photojournalist Suzanna Cardoso who is pregnant still wielding a camera and with the Asahi Shimbun reporter. I touched her tummy, and grabbed her skinny forearm, and said "kuidado" or "be careful". What else could i say? She said she had no choice because with the baby coming, she needed money and this was something she had to do. Sitting next to me was Rosa Garcia who has only one week ago given birth assisting another japanese TV journalist at the airport. And from calls, i know that Francisco who heads the Timor Leste Media Development Centre has been assisting Voice of America these few days. There are many others like them.

in fact, when troubles first began late april, the local PBS called RTTL (radio tv timor leste) was doing an admirable job of reporting on the development of events. They had reporters travelling to the district of Aileu to interview Major Reinado, and rushing back in time for the evening's news. They also borrowed the portable transmitter from Radio Rakambia and went out to the districts in the bid to relay radio and tv news so that those who had ran to the hills could hear the information. At that point in time, there was calm in Dili despite the persistent rumours that civil war was going to take place and that people should desert the city (ok so it did come true eventually but that's something to debate about in another blog) . In fact, a radio team that went to Suai to do so was nearly attacked by a mob for being 'pro-government' by broadcasting news of peace in Dili which was the FACT at that time. So yes, the RTTL has done a really good job considering the odds.

And also because this conflict is close to them - each reporter is either a 'west' or an 'east' and so they also while trying to focus on reporting, have on the back of their minds if their homes are still standing or not. Plus the fact that many are not fluent in english and if they blog or report in tetum, how many would read it?

Anyways, just my personal thoughts. I wanted to share a part of an email i received yesterday from a timorese friend. He told me it's ok to share it online cos i explained to him that people want to hear what timorese feels.NOTE: this was before it was annoucned that the oz troops will hv more power to disarm the gangs.


I was so pleased to receive your calling; you gave me a spirit of life. I
have been staying in the office for 4 nights and don't know yet to return to
my own home.

Our leaders have not come yet to a decision to stop the violence even Ausi
troops are hopeless to arrest those who involved in the crimes instead of
showing power.

My country likes no leaders and no one care to other's life, people killed
each other just like a chicken and no human values exist in the country.

HELP IS ON HAND. BUT JUST A LITTLE OUT OF REACH!

PICTURE by Bishnu Pokrel, Water & Sanitation Project Officer, UNICEF Timor-Leste
Date: 290506
A brave smile despite the mounting difficulties of staying inside a camp for Internally Displaced People. Aid agencies and the UN agencies are desperately trying to reach out to the thousands in camps near and in Dili.


UNICEF's Press Release dated 29 may 2006.

HELP IS ON HAND. BUT JUST A LITTLE OUT OF REACH!
Deteriorating security situation prevents immediate relief reaching thousands who have sought refuge within camps in Dili


29th May, Dili - For nearly 50,000 people in 35 camps in the capital city of Dili, Timor-Leste, relief is still not in sight due to the deteriorating security situation. Nearly 20,000 of these were already living in camps having fled from their homes after the 28th April disturbances. The Inter-agency humanitarian assistance group set up last month and led by the Ministry of Labour and Community Reinsertion, comprising UNICEF among others, is prepared to move in with essential supplies to these camps. But this help is just a little bit out of reach for those who need it most.

Timorese residents of Dili - fearing attacks on their properties and themselves - have moved out of their homes into several overcrowded locations in and around Dili. Many people have left the capital for district areas, while others remain in Dili seeking safety and shelter in churches, schools, the airport, and many other locations. Children are exposed to physical and mental trauma and unsanitary living conditions in these camps, some of which house nearly 2000 persons against an original capacity of just 300 or so. At least on-third of this number are children below 14 years old.

UNICEF, as a critical member of the UN Inter-agency humanitarian assistance task force, is conducting assessments within camps, procuring essential supplies, briefing the national and international media and coordinating with the interagency group.

Bishnu Pokhrel, UNICEF WES officer conducted assessments on 28th May in two locations in Fatumeta and Bairo Pite, both of which are overburdened with people fleeing from their homes. These locations, like many others in Dili are fast running out of food and water supply. He confirmed that the conditions were unsanitary in these camps and it was only a matter of time before diseases began affecting these people.

UNICEF is specifically responsible for water and sanitation facilities to be beefed up within these camps, and also attend to the immediate protection of children from neglect and abuse and that children are given opportunities for being involved in activities to stimulate and engage them.

UNICEF has placed orders for basic family water kits, tarpaulin, water tanks, field water testing kits, squatting plates for latrines and school-in-a-box kits.

However, the unstable security situation has prevented access to some areas where there are people in need. If the security situation does not improve, it is possible that the humanitarian crisis could worsen significantly. As long as the situation is so fluid, it is difficult to move freely to distribute relief supplies.

“This causes greater stress on women and their children, who are now faced with no food, are exposed to unsafe water and unclean surroundings. This means that infants and children will be at risk of infections and over a long term, malnutrition”, said Ms.Shui-Meng Ng, UNICEF Representative.

UNICEF along with the Inter-Agency Humanitarian Assistance Group has been delivering assistance until 25th May, after people in Dili were displaced from their homes during the days following the 28th April disturbances. The Inter-Agency Humanitarian Assistance Group is comprised of the following agencies, led by the Ministry of Labour and Reinsertion, Government of Timor-Leste; WHO, UNICEF, IOM, UNDP, UNFPA, WFP, International Red Cross, Cruz Vermelha De Timor-Leste (National Red Cross), Oxfam Australia, Plan international, Health net, Red Cross and Care International, Catholic Relief Services, Caritas Australia.

For more information, contact:

Madhavi Ashok, Communication Officer
HP: +670 7231103
Email – mashok@unicef.org

dili burning

Just received news that some of my colleagues' homes have been burnt. The situation in dili seems to be yoyo-ing --- from good to bad very quickly. everytime i call back to Dili, there's something new. One moment, all is peaceful and quiet and UNICEF staff able to return home. The next time i call, they're back again in the UN compound, with grim news like that.

One of those whose house was burnt had succeeded narrowly to protect her home just a few days ago. She had returned to the office on Wednesday in a very emotional state. She cried and said, " If they want to kill me, let them but please, ask them to spare the children."

Yes, spare the children.

They are the most innocent ones who are suffering the most in this chaos.

The ones who went through the massacres in 99 are now reliving their horrible time. The memories that might have been dulled with six years of normality must become freshly vivid again. The young ones who have never experienced 99 are now being dragged along by their fleeing families or seeking shelter in crowded camp conditions. They are now experiencing what their older siblings went through. Already many children in Timor are malnourished due to the high level of poverty in the country, so all that this chaos has done is to worsen the condition. The rains pouring down has not helped either, with malaria & dengue-bearing mosquitoes also on the loose.

It's ironic how before, we had been trying to persuade donors that even though the emergency period in Timor was officially over but still needed as much resources as before to assure that the children grow up in a protective environment, where there is education, food, and expression of their rights. You see, donors (read you, me, countries, govts) often shift funds to 'emergencies' around the world. it's as if, we simply drop off their radars. So it's ironic how this crisis would pull the radar back to this country. I'd really rather it didn't happen this way.

i'm attaching the latest presser from UN here.


UN INTER-AGENCY HUMANITARIAN ASSISTANCE GROUP CONTINUES TO ATTEND TO NEEDS OF IDP’S LOCATED WITHIN DILI

28 May, 2006/ Dili; The Inter-Agency Humanitarian Assistance Group has drawn up a plan to rapidly deliver much needed emergency supplies to Internally Displaced People (IDPs) congregated at more than 35 makeshift camps throughout the city of Dili.

Relief efforts continue and will be stepped up as soon as the security situation eases. The group, led by the Ministry of Labour and Community Reinsertion is comprised of UN agencies and local and international NGO’s.

A spokesperson for the group, Mr Luis Vieira from IOM, said today that food and water has now been distributed to over 30 camps by government staff. However, the unstable security situation has prevented access to some areas where there are people in need.

“If the security situation does not improve, it is possible that the humanitarian crisis could worsen significantly. Families are in need of basic supplies such as food, water, and sanitation to protect against disease, but as long as the situation is so fluid, it is difficult to move freely to distribute relief supplies.” he said.

The last known number of people displaced from their homes is over 50,000, although this is thought to have increased significantly over the last few days. Many people have left the capital for district areas, while others remain in Dili seeking safety and shelter in churches, schools, the airport, and many other locations.

“This causes greater stress on women and their children who are now faced with no food, are exposed to unsafe water and unclean surroundings. This means that infants and children will be at risk of infections and over a long term, malnutrition”, said Ms.Shui-Meng Ng, UNICEF Representative.

The Inter-Agency Humanitarian Assistance Group has been delivering assistance until 25th of May, after people in Dili were displaced from their homes during the days following the 28th April disturbances.

The UN Special Representative to the Secretary General, Sukehiro Hasegawa stressed that humanitarian work is continuing. “The most recent unrest has disrupted these efforts, but as much as possible supplies are being distributed wherever and whenever we can access. This effort is ready to be stepped up as soon as the security situation eases up, which we are working on, in conjunction with the Australian Security Forces.”

The Inter-Agency Humanitarian Assistance Group is comprised of the following agencies, led by the government of Timor-Leste; WHO, UNICEF, IOM, UNDP, UNFPA, WFP, International Red Cross, Cruz Vermelha De Timor-Leste (National Red Cross), Oxfam Australia, Plan international, Health net, Red Cross and Care International, Catholic Relief Services, Caritas Australia.

RED CROSS TIMOR-LESTE APPEAL

Red Cross has launched an appeal to support the people affected by the current unrest in Timor-Leste.

Up to fifty thousand people are estimated to have left their homes because of the violence and are living in makeshift camps around the country.

Funds raised by the Australian Red Cross Timor-Leste Appeal will help provide food and other relief items such as tarpaulins, tents, house hold items, and mosquito nets, as well as logistical and communications support.

'By launching this appeal we can help with the immediate needs of those who have fled their homes,' said Robert Tickner, CEO of Australian Red Cross.

'However this appeal will also help us to contribute to the longer-term development of Australia's closest neighbour. Our commitment to supporting the people of Timor-Leste and the Timor-Leste Red Cross must extend beyond this current situation as Timor-Leste remains the poorest country in the region,' he said.

'Support for projects which improve the health and wellbeing of the people are central to nation-building.'

According to Mr Tickner, the fledgling Timor-Leste Red Cross has been working closely with the Timor-Leste Government over the past week, helping distribute food and other relief supplies as well as monitoring the state of the more than 30 camps that have sprung up across the country.

In Australia, Red Cross staff and volunteers in Darwin have been registering people evacuated from Timor-Leste, collecting their details and entering them into the National Registration and Inquiry System (NRIS). Family and friends seeking information on people being evacuated can contact the Red Cross on 08 8924 3900.

To donate to the 'Timor-Leste Appeal':

Visit www.redcross.org.au to make a secure online donation
all 1800 811 700 toll free
send a cheque to GPO Box 2957 Melbourne VIC 8060 marked 'Timor-Leste Appeal'

The funds raised through this appeal will be used for the following activities:
to support the relief, rehabilitation and on-going long term development activities of the Red Cross and Red Crescent movement in Timor-Leste, through the emergency appeal

to fund any deployment of specialist aid workers to Timor-Leste to assist in the International Red Cross response

to support any Australian Red Cross programs of assistance in Timor-Leste

to support the ongoing development of the Timor Leste Red Cross (CVTL)

NOTE: Australian Red Cross will not deduct more than 10% of any donation for an international appeal to cover appeal costs. Should the funds raised exceed the amount required to meet the immediate and longer-term needs of the people in the affected areas, Australian Red Cross will use any excess funds to help people affected by emergencies within the same region of the world

back home safely - but what about those left behind?

I think the impact of leaving hit me the moment i got onto the UNICEF car and was driven out of the UN compound towards the Australian Embassy. The tears just would not stop rolling down my cheeks. The pain was indescribable. I hugged Madhu, and the other colleagues - there was so much confusion, dilemma, sadness, anguish all together at the same time. I had made the decision to leave very quickly - when there was a window of opportunity to leave according to the security guys - and i was given the permission instantly by my chief. In my mind, i was thinking whether i did the right thing, and i was feeling so painfully guilty for leaving my colleagues behind, and yet thinking of my parents back home all at the same time. This must be the anguish felt by every single person who had to take that terrible choice of going - leaving - it's like a bad bad tear in your heart. At that time, the security phase was still at 2 although the situation was still worsening. I felt horrid because it was not time to leave yet, something inside me propelled me to go when another consultant asked to leave.

When i got to the Embassy, things were still quiet. I got my OZ visa very quickly - without having to fill in pages of forms like the others there and was asked to wait for the C-130 that would be coming any time. At that time, SIF calls to say that a JICA-chartered International SOS flight was coming and that since i was also under ISOS, i could hop onto that flight. The decision was finally taken to join the JICA flight since there were so many people clamouring for the Darwin military flight and fewer on the JICA flight so if i left with ISOS, there would be at least one more seat available for anyone else going out. Very soon after, a group of singaporeans arrived at the embassy too and i left with Armando back to his place for a shower (i was really dirty after 48 hours without a bath) and then returned to the embassy again for the pick up. By that time, the embassy doors was packed with Chinese nationals desperate to get in too. But sadly, they had to wait for a long while as the OZ govt took a long time to process their visas. Even Armando's family was not allowed to get their visas as they were asking for things like bank statements etc to prove their financial independence. Armando's australian passport was only helpful to himself so he refused to be evacuated until he could find some way of getting his family out too.

I parted ways with him at 5pm at the airport when i pushed him to return home while there was still light. The whole afternoon had been pretty peaceful with the OZ soldiers securing the main road leading from town to the airport. We hugged and said our goodbyes, and prayed that we'll see each other very soon. The plane finally took off at 8pm and we landed at Halim international about 930pm indon time and was sent to the hotel by ISOS representatives whom i must say did a superb job bringing us from one point to another.

The next morning, while in jakarta, i received news that the UN was in phase 3 and non-essential staff already asked to evacuate. It turned out that i had made a timely decision as my leaving meant one less person for them to worry, especially since i was a volunteer.

It's been 3 days since Friday when i left Dili. Seems like a long time, my concept of days all blurred up as so many things happened since Tuesday. I've been making calls to the friends in Dili to find out how they are. Some have evacuated, while others have stayed behind because their jobs demand they do that. We can only pray for their safety and trust that they make all the best decisions to stay safe.

I'm still struggling with the guilt in some ways. It's not like you clean out your memory drive when you land in Changi Airport. No, the images stay in the mind, the people you care for who are left behind, - there's a sense of helplessness too.

wounded

I saw a familiar face in the UN medical clinic as I tried to see how I could help out. Someone had asked for anyone with first aid experience to chip in to help the wounded Police men and women that had been brought into the UN compound. At first, i didn't recognise me but later I realise that this was the police friend that a fellow Singaporean trusted a lot. He was laying wounded on the bed, in agony, wishing he could die and be spared the pain. I held his hand tightly - nothing else i could do. His wounds were dressed, just awaiting surgery.

In the clinic, there was no time to feel fear or sadness. We just tried to see how we could help, with instructions from the (thankfully) many doctors working in the UN system. I put on gloves and tried to clean some wounds, bandage some, and comfort others - holding their hands and talking to them, trying to reassure them. I don't think I was 'feeling' anything at that moment. NONE of us did, we just did what was necessary.

One guy was going into shock, thankfully a good Timorese doctor started a second IV drop that pulled him back from the brink of death. He had a big gash on his hip, his legs, his arms. He was floating in between consciousness. I held his arm, and tried talking to him, kept asking him to pray and be brave. I was relieved when he finally grabbed my fingers in response. I hope he's doing alright now in hospital.

Earlier when the first wounded policeman was carried in with four bullet wounds on his chest, (this was just outside where everyone had gathered), it really was an emotional scene. my tears just kept rolling down, and i kept saying 'Hail Marys' and 'Our Fathers' to calm myself down. My heart bled for the women and children who would lose their fathers today. I cried out to the Lord to put sense back into these men's minds. Today is the DAY OF OBLIGATION for the Ascension of the Lord! This is all so wrong.

The police man died.

NO ONE should die this way.

i'm not bothering to say what actually happened today cos even if i do, it doesn't make sense. war fare makes no sense. We should simply ban guns around the world.

Pray for peace my friends, if you're reading

so do i exist or not?

So, i get an email from Singapore international Foundation saying:

"MFA has issued a public travel advisory last night."
From CNA:"It is ... advising Singaporeans who reside there to leave while commercial flights are available. "

My question is to WHOM did MFA issue this advisory to? Cos I surely DID NOT receive one phone call or sms from MFA officials sitting in their cushy offices at Minden Road. also, they shouldn't be expecting us to be able to watch CNA here - it's only available if you have satellite access.

So was the MFA really issuing out the advisory warning to people in Timor or for people in Singapore to 'see' that they are?

I've heard that there's been some calling but hey, there're only 40 something of us here and yet, no one has yet dialed my number.. HELLO! Do i exist or not? Anyways, to set the record straight, i'm not expecting them to really say anything useful to me when they call and I feel a lot safer here under the UN umbrella.

Also, they have tasked a non-civil servant (read unpaid) singaporean who's big hearted enough to call everyone here in Dili. Ok, fine,she missed me out too, but can i blame her? Here's ONE person in Dili having crap telecommunications abilities to call 40 plus people. Come on MFA, surely you have enough officers to do that in Singapore. The satellite phone provided also didn't work by the way.

If the government is sincere in ADVISING singaporeans to leave, they should pick up their phones from their cosy seats in singapore to call us or SMS us. OR like what Australia has done - arrange a flight out for singaporeans. ACTION more than talk please. As i write this, Australia has already evacuated 60 persons back to Darwin.

"Singaporeans who wish to leave Timor Leste but who have encountered difficulties doing so should also contact the ministry, whose Duty Office is open 24 hours."

BUT WAIT, just above this line was this:

It is also advising Singaporeans who reside there to leave while commercial flights are available.

In fact, someone did call the MFA and was advised to take the Merpati flight back! DUDE! if we could, would we be calling you??? COME ON! GET REAL!

Ok, and for concerned MFA folks reading this blog, if you do send a chopper to get us, please ensure that we can get to the airport safely too. Ok, perhaps you think that's too much to ask of you but the reality is, no matter how many choppers you send, we won't be able to get out of Timor unless there's a safe passage TO the airport. That's one reason why not more AUstralians are making their way to the airport which is to the left of the city and at least 20 minutes ride away.

Also, I refuse to leave if it means having to endanger a driver's life to send me there. Say, i happen to get there in one piece, who can guarantee the driver's safety on his way back? What if he gets hurt going back to the UN compound? Can i bear that guilt?

Anyways, for now, it's safer to hunker down instead of running amok - into any possible cross fire.

The gunfire is still ringing in the night.
A flare is up in the sky.
A plane is trying to land in pitch darkness.
I'm sleeping on a cold hard floor tonight - but what about the thousands with no mosquito nets, no shelter, no warm food, out there?

crackling through the air

"Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr brrrrrrrrrrrrr brrrrrrrrrrrrr"..... a rapid shower of automatic gunfire rung through the hills.

Yesterday i heard for the first time, since troubles began, the volley of gun fire with my own ears.

Then came the dull, heavy "BOOM BOOM BOOM" exploding in the far distance. A few of us gathered outside the Kobe Huts in the UN compound and stared intently into the hills behind us. We could not see any action but could surely hear it.

Instead of feeling terrified, I thought of how this crackling reminds me of joyous occasions. Probably the only time a normal Singaporean (read non-soldier or police) hears or sees this sort of pyrotechnic action is during our National Day Parade when we're treated to a spectacular ear-deafening fireworks show, with colourful patterns exploding into the skies - swirls, bright pinpricks, and even smiley faces. This loud crackling is synonmous with joy and celebration, not fear and anguish as it usually is in other parts of the world.

In that short moment of my revelry, I was once again reminded of how lucky and perhaps how divorced from reality most Singaporeans are. Can we even understand the terror and fear in the hearts of the children and families as they flee from their homes - bags of rice, clothings, plastic pails and cooking stoves ladened on their heads, shoulders and their backs? The UN compound is filling up again with families fearing that they might be attacked. Two weeks ago when the families came, it was propelled by baseless rumours of impending civil war. Now, they are here because the fighting has begun.

Don't get me wrong, it's not like there are armed men riding up and down the streets fighting and that we're in danger of the crossfire. The fighting is still concentrated up in the hills behind us but we can hear them well. But riding on the confusion are some people who are taking the opportunity to seek vengeance on those who may have offended them before - setting their homes on fire on the pretext that they're from 'east' or 'west' of Timor.

This morning I woke up to the staccato notes of automatic guns. What a strange morning call it is, I would prefer a crowing cock, thank you. As I lie in bed, listening to the sporadic bursts echoing through the cold morning air, I hear an interview on ABC Radio about Australian troops getting ready to land here to restore peace. The interviewer is asking Alexander Downer if the OZ soldiers would be able to deal with the Timorese soldiers - the same troops they had helped to train. Apparently one of the Commanders, Major Alfredo, who took some of his Military Police men up the hills, had even been in Australia before.

For me, it is not so much that but more the question of whether while focusing on training the Timorese soldiers on war fare and strategy, did the Australians ever think of transferring soft skills of leadership, conflict resolution and management? This question is not aimed just at the Australian troop trainers but at all the 'capacity-building' advisors and trainers that this country has seen too many of. It forces us all to reflect if we have helped at all.

This issue of the discrimination in the army is not a new one. In fact, the splintering signs began as early as 2002 when some soldiers had quit in protest. Today's situation of the 594 who quit is simply it boiling over. Major Alfredo's team that broke away too is a clear sign that there is no credible leadership within the army nor the government.

It's all too easy for arm chair critics to say what has gone wrong, what could have been done, or who's to blame etc. But it is plain to see that a much earlier intervention and a more consultative leadership would have defused the situation. The government's credibility is suffering because the people say it has not listened to their concerns and has pushed them over to resorting to violence and civil disobedience.

Someone asked me a few months back to reflect on my time here and what i have learnt as an SIF (Singapore International Foundation)volunteer. I think at this point in time, besides the larger political complexities, it is clearer than ever before a reliable media and telecommunications infrastructure!

Case in point: G called me in Maubisse - she's still stuck there because there are no transport going back into Dili. Although only 3 hours away from Dili, they are unable to receive any radio or tv signals from the country's public broadcasting service. Instead, they are relying on ABC Radio from Australia! Go figure. We have long bemoaned the country's dismal telecommunications infrastructure because it has impacted to some extent UNICEF's children's radio programme in the community radio stations. But this political fraca has really highlighted the urgent need for reliable transmitters that can inform the population of what's happening in the country.

I feel that this lack of information from Dili over the last few years, and hence the lack of mental intimacy with the central government makes it hard for the people in the districts to connect back to Dili. I'm in a hungry to end this blog now. will continue again another time. We hear gunfire outside our compound.

Tata

God's tears and we swim in S***

The heavens opened this afternoon and has not stopped pouring tears down upon Timor. I joked that it was God trying to intervene in the 'hot' situation here in Dili - perhaps this would cool things down, and maybe make the rioting wild men sick from a bad bad cold and then they have to rest instead of making trouble. Another friend just smsed me the same thought.
But guess what? While God shed tears for Timor, we - here - are getting flooded thanks to bad piping and drainage system(read = bad fengshui) in the UN compound.
Our section, which together with the Education folks occupies the Kobe Hut #5, has the seat of honour next to the septic tanks - so every two days when the trucks come, we take in some strong scents concocted by Mother Nature. I'm still figuring out whom I can sue when my lungs fill up with thick layers of organic fertilisers. But that's a story for another day.
What's more URGENT here, is that we're in danger of the flood waters bursting into the loose lids of the septic tank because water keeps draining out the compound next to ours, right into our area! We even have to wade our way to the loos which are behind the kobe hut and in shin-deep waters.

But wait... hang on... as I pound this out onto my PC, the rains have stopped. It's coming to a trickle.... yes! Hallelujah! But the scene outside has not changed. I'll have to get wet to get home now...

All i can say is God sure is humourous.

ema whisperer

"You heard the latest yet?"

Hushed tones. conspiracy. apprehension. curiousity. rumours.

Explode into craziness.

This is what is tearing this country apart

- whispers of news with explosive effects.

Armando & I were at Peace Park last Friday night attending a poetry and art night about peace and love. The poets were reading out their poems in hushed tones, somewhat subdued by the ongoing tension. Then someone remarked "why are we whispering when it comes to peace? but why is it that when it's about war and violence, people shout. why don't we shout about love?"

He made a great point - why is it that one rumour can send tens of thousands of people fleeing from their homes so effectively and in contrast, only 30 people turned up for this poetry reading?

Remember that Robert Redford movie "The Horse Whisperer" about a guy who tamed wild horses by connecting with them and gaining their trust? Perhaps we now need a few "People whisperer" here in this country - not the police, not the military, not peacekeeping forces. Read this interesting article of how a real life Horse Whisperer has been called in to 'tame' children in the UK...

maybe he should come to Timor to tame the angry men here

the fist or the mouth?

Gunshots heard again...
Some houses have been burnt...
Rocks thrown and young people people again in trouble...

My heart is heavy.
In fact, since the day that Fretilin Congress voted back Mari Alkatiri and Lu'olo, i've been apprehensive of what may happen.
I'm not against Alkatiri, but I know that having him here might just prolong the impasse. Unless Mr PM makes a drastic move to reach out to his estranged men in the hills.

This uneasiness that hangs in the air bears down on all of us insidiously...

Anyways...recent events have made me think that perhaps the prolonged years of warring and violence in Timor has created a people with the propensity to use the fist to resolve their problems.
People in positions of influence and power have been heard saying "If you want war, we'll have war." An innocent boy with a bright future, and headed for the ASEAN games is stabbed to death one evening while hanging out with his mates because someone from a rival martial arts gang didn't like one of his friends and had launched a surprise attack. A peaceful demonstration turns into burning cars and houses, a few dead and guns fired into the air or as some say, into people.
Of course, this ain't unique to Timor as we can see daily that it happens elsewhere in the world. And of course, not every Timorese is a raging, irrational bull. But i am only interested in the problems of this country which i am living now, and the people who are causing so much chaos, thus this narrow discourse.
Against this backdrop of anger, i can't help thinking of the gentle people of Hawaii. What impressed me most during my time in Hawaii was the love for "talking stories." Hawaiians love to talk stories to one another, using this oral tradition to relate incidents, to discuss unhappiness and to resolve their conflicts. Thus, they have built up a strong use of mediation and non-violence. When Hawaiians are angry, they use to Hula to express their anger, singing their traditional songs and stomping out their moves with their feet and their drums. They protest in front of the government house with music and dance. I wish more people would embrace this form of negotiation. Perhaps Timor needs to re-establish the tribal councils it must used to have during a time when liurais or kings were powerful. Perhaps the work the UN has done here to spread the knowledge of Human Rights has not made any difference. Have we really instilled in the young people the right to respect life? The people here need to realise that they have to STOP the cycle of violence.
But how to when perhaps they believe that violence is the only effective way of attaining change for them? Many of them were guerillas who fought for 2 decades for Timor's independence. Of course, shrewd diplomacy, the support of the international community, combined with political fluke and change in indonesia contributed to the independece referendum. But I think most Timorese believe that it was largely their resistance in the jungles that has allowed them to fly their own flag.
So when will this cycle of violence end? We're talking about a traumatised nation. GOD HELP US ALL.

some timorese bubbly for you?

Tua Mutin - palm wine
Originally uploaded by tumbleweeed.

The foam you see - they're not soap suds mind you! the foamy stizzuf spewing out of the reused Aqua bottles is actually the natural fizz from Tua Mutin - or White Liquor, a locally made palm wine that you see sold along the roadsides across the country.
Last year when I was in Venilale, Jose had brought me around to see how they tapped the palm fruits to make the wine. Tua Mutin is the mildest, with Tua Metan (Dark Liquor) and Tua Sabo( i dunno what Sabo means) the most potent. Armando calls Tua Sabo the real Timorese coffee!
Anyways, i took this picture in Quelicai, cos I don't usually see Tua Mutin being so bubbly. There was also a very strong fermented smell. When i tasted Tua Mutin in Venilale, it tasted mild, and with coconut flavour -rather pleasant while Tua Sabo is strong tasting.I wonder how many are in the mood to enjoy any bubbly now. There is still a certain amount of tension in Dili despite the fact that life is pretty normal now for us - buses, people, markets are back in action but the Fretilin Congress opens tomorrow and already the local press and the OZ press have begun reporting extensively on the possibilities of troubles considering that the Timorese ambassador to the UN has openly challenged Alkatiri's leadership.
I only pray that PEACE will prevail no matter what happens. I hope that the losing party will accept the decision of the party members peacefully. I really hope that the rumours that Alkatiri will resort to military crackdown should he lose his party's support will not come true.
It's really tough trying to run a young nation - with high percentage of the populace uneducated and thus unable to differentiate sound policy versus populist promises. The recent violence here also goes to show that the young people (almost 50% of Timor)are not fully tuned into the demands of democracy - i.e. democracy comes with responsiblity!
No one should resort to violence to get their way. They can use their votes in 2007 if they don't like the government! But no, the primal instincts have overwhelmed a large number of youths - many unemployed, frustrated, uneducated, with few life-skills to guide them to make sensible decisions - so they simply end up following the crowd. If a leader calls them to boycott, they would.
It is this excess energies that the government needs to engage. But alas, as already admitted by many, the government labelled UN's shining baby has dealt very well internationally but has forgotten to relate to its people. As a result, many Timorese are left behind, feel disenfranchised especially after having fought for the war and feel like things should be better and not worse than during Indonesian times.
And so it is - from an issue concerning 594 sacked soldiers, this matter has really blown up into a bigger matter - an indication that the underlying unhappiness has been stewing and so easily provoked.
It's tough being a leader, really tough.

Soul Mountain

Matebian mountain - awesome!
Originally uploaded by tumbleweeed.

That's "Matebian" mountain or Soul Mountain in Baucau district. Beautiful ain't it? I only wish that i had a better camera or a device as panoramic as my eyes to capture the view as we departed Baucau yesterday morning. It was awe-inspiring. Everything's pretty normal on the eastern side of Timor-Leste. Baucau also has a wonderfully cool climate that beats the sweaty heat of Dili!